2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
"Tell me, does it make sense to go through 1 psychological consultation if there is psychosomatics - psoriasis", "Recommend some (magic) pills to make everything work out" … "Tell me something about me, please."
These are real requests from people I didn't know before.
In 1 hour, you can process 1 experience (unpleasant, painful) that happened to a person. Or in one hour I can teach you the technology to process painful experiences on your own, and then it will take weeks and months of independent work. And in order to pull this all out on his own, a person must have at least an iron motivation (and, as a rule, there is none)
Why is it so long - weeks and months? Because, as a rule, a person turns to a psychologist with more than one conflict, which is understandable, and happened yesterday and for the first time - no, a person brings vooooot such a tangle of problems and negative experiences in different areas that he has accumulated over his 20s, 30s, 40s. years old. The person himself does not know where the beginning of his problems is (in most requests - the beginning in childhood)
That is, let's say, 25 years ago in childhood something happened and since then something in a person's life has imperceptibly gone not quite as it should, as a result, after 25 years, the “deviation from the course” became so large and difficult. that the person decides to go to a psychologist.
I really like the model of psychological ages. The bottom line is that a person's body and intellect have matured, and the psyche is stuck at some (childhood, adolescence, adolescence) age. Often in the nursery !!! Failed crisis for 3 years - that's it, we got stuck there. What to do? Grow up. That is, a person came and expects that in one hour of consultation we will "grow" him from 3 to 25 (40, 50) years.
If you have been “digging this hole” day after day for so many years, no excavator can fill it up in 1 hour!
People often expect miracles, they don't really understand what psychological work is.
And this is building a special environment and relations between a psychologist and a client, where the client can safely grow up, discover new ways of behavior (and so, it turns out, it is also possible), get out his conflicts, pain, resentment, unjustified expectations and finally process them and rid yourself of them.
Psychological work is work. With homework, with feedback, where the psychologist will be your mirror - a very honest mirror - and this is not always pleasant for the client. But this is also a way to grow up to be able to independently cope with life situations (and not get stuck in them)
A psychologist helps a person to grow independently (!).
I have no magic wand. There is knowledge, techniques, a desire to delve into, help, support, enjoy growth.
I wish you all awareness and a wonderful day!
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