The Rubber Band Of The Life Scenario: There Is No Escape From The Past

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Video: The Rubber Band Of The Life Scenario: There Is No Escape From The Past

Video: The Rubber Band Of The Life Scenario: There Is No Escape From The Past
Video: Demons - Imagine Dragons 2024, April
The Rubber Band Of The Life Scenario: There Is No Escape From The Past
The Rubber Band Of The Life Scenario: There Is No Escape From The Past
Anonim

The rubber band of the script, like a catapult, throws you into the reference situation of your childhood whenever you reproduce in the present something from which you have so diligently fled all your life.

How does the rubber band of the script bind you hand and foot, and how does it all work?

Life Scenario Rubber Band: Back to the Future

Lifeguard's rubber band: the eternal search for the perfect love Life Scenario Rubber Band: Back to the Future Lifeguard's rubber band: the eternal search for the perfect love

Imagine a huge rubber band stretched over time. She becomes attached to some current situation, which reminds of childhood pain, click - and we rush into the past.

At one end of the rubber band is you, at the other is your script partner from your childhood.

How the life script rubber band is formed and how it works

- I break into my daughter, she literally pisses me off. I can't stand it and beat her to bruises on the palm, a young pretty woman complains in a helpless voice.

She explains as if to herself: - I promise myself not to do this anymore, I restrain myself, and then … and then I flare up and …. And all over again.

- Whom do you metaphorically copy when you rush to your daughter? I ask her.

This question for me is about who is on the other end of the rubber band of her clearly scripted behavior and "again and again" breakdown.

- Mom! She answers without hesitation. Only she never physically punished me. But she literally beat me with words, criticism, hostility. Angry, bilious, disgusted. She cries, her shoulders are pressed, her face becomes childish.

- And then you decided? What? I ask.

- I then swore to myself that I would never act like her with my daughter.

An early baby solution that forms a rubber band. The girl grows up learning to suppress her anger.

She is caring and compassionate towards others. And she is very strict with herself. She crushes in herself not only angry feelings, but also herself as an active, creative and lively girl - herself in childhood.

She tends to accumulate anger, tries not to criticize her daughter, not to make comments, and most importantly, not to get angry. And then exploding, breaking off this road of patience, he no longer controls himself.

The scenario conflict here between the child's decision "I will not be like a mother" and the absorbed pattern of mother's behavior ties the woman with a rubber band to her childhood.

The image is collective, the situation is invented for better understanding

What to do? Tearing the rubber band - work in two directions and at once from both ends:

  1. End of the tape from the side of reference situations in childhood - we make a new adult expanding solution, we activate the Live Girl.
  2. The end of the rubber band today - learning new ways of dealing with anger, introducing new behaviors, prescribing permission in the Parent to take care of ourselves, play, and express our feelings and desires.

The work is going to be interesting and difficult, but it is so necessary for the results both for her daughter and for herself.

Recommendation: are you aware of the effect of the rubber band in your behavior? Contact the author of the article for re-resolution scenario therapy. Waiting for you.

How does script eraser work in your life?

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