2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Author: Mikhail Labkovsky Source:
And remember, Dora, sex in the thoughts of men is dangerous in two cases: if there is always only sex in their thoughts, and if sex is always only in thoughts β¦
Some marry, already knowing that they did not coincide in sex: that they want completely different things from this business and they definitely cannot give this to a friend. And yet they still get married!
They think that there are more compelling reasons for creating a family than the joys of carnal pleasures, such as - spiritual kinship, common interests, coinciding tastes and common goals β¦ "We both want to have a baby" and, in the end, "we have so much fun together" - they claim and run to the registry office.
In the worst case, it ends with the wife saying to her husband every other time: "Come on from behind and quickly, BUT IT IS ABSOLUTELY ABOUT." After suffering for some time β¦ he gets a mistress.
Or here are some women who never take the initiative about intimacy. And the man does not know at all whether she wants him or not. Rather, from a certain moment he thinks that he does not want a dash, he does not like it. He meets a woman who openly demonstrates interest in having sex with him β¦ and has a mistress.
Or do you ask, for example, at the reception: do you practice oral sex? And you hear the answer as from a classic joke: "So that she would kiss my children with these lips then?" This is severe infantilism.
Because only in adolescents platonic feelings are separated from erotic experiences. They fall in love with the blue eyes of their classmates, and in sexual fantasies they imagine themselves with adult women.
As a boy grows up, love and sex drive are combined. And those who are forever lagging behind in development remain in the position: "My wife is the mother of my children - this is sacred." And for sex they have a mistress. (We will talk about the reasons for female infidelity separately).
The best case, although why the best? - one of the spouses comes to my appointment and asks how to live on, "after all, my wife and I are like relatives" and "this is my closest person on earth", but I don't want to have sex with him. And to go to the side is disgusting.
And itβs a really big tragedy when people really love each other, but donβt want to. And then something needs to be decided. And it's better to decide before the wedding and the appearance of children. Because no amount of spiritual kinship will save a family with sexual disharmony. BECAUSE SEX IS MOST IMPORTANT in a relationship. Sex is the basis of the foundations, and it is also in the head, in the same place where common interests are.
And of course, it's great if you like the same Fellini films, but on the other hand, after good sex it doesn't matter what she watches there - Dom-2 or the TV series Bring Back My Love on the Russia 1 channel. But after an unsuccessful, especially repeatedly unsuccessful, Fellini will not help.
Because if people are doing well in sex, then in some main, deep, basic things they are absolutely in solidarity. And this is the most important level at which the pair must match. And it will be followed by everyday and human. But on the contrary, it doesn't work.
My grandmother asked the ambulance doctor who came to save her from a hypertensive crisis: "Have you read Zweig?" And if I didnβt read it, I would give him a book with me. She liked to deal more with a doctor who read the classics. So, with partners it is not necessary. A high relationship is good, and sex is better, especially if you're going to live happily ever after with the person.
Sometimes a colleague, acquaintance, friend - smart, handsome, sane - suddenly starts dating a girl who wears purple lipstick and says "nipOnyala". And they clearly have love and complete interpenetration. The public is at a loss why this particular sucker?
Say, around him, so respectable, there are so many chic, tastefully dressed heifers! Among the versions, a vulgar folk one flickers: "Probably, it gives well." And this version is the most correct.
People came up to each other in bed, and the well-dressed girls of "his circle" tried so hard to keep up the conversation about Kierkegaard that they could not relax.
And a little romance: of course, a lot depends on whether we meet "our" person or not. Such that both a friend and a lover (life friend / lover) at the same time is really the most successful combination and a guarantee of family longevity.
We all dream about this, thank fate or complain about it, forgetting that there is absolutely nothing accidental in happy meetings. That their ideal partner is met by people who are ready for this meeting: they have dealt with themselves, their childhood traumas and complexes, experienced and outlived severe neuroses, know what they want from life and the opposite sex, and they do not have serious conflicts with themselves.
Otherwise, each new relationship becomes a test of strength for both participants and inevitably ends in mutual disappointment. (And new complexes).
What can I say, many unsuccessful attempts to establish a relationship or even build a family are made due to disbelief that there is our ideal partner in the world - a person who suits us in terms of smell, body temperature and sexual habits.
People often reason like this: βYes, I donβt like the way he fusses in bed, but he seems to be a good man, and his mother promised to give us an apartmentβ. Or: "She, of course, reacts somewhat strangely to my caresses, but she cooks well and, for sure, will become a good mother to my children."
Yes, there should not be any BUT! It is necessary to decide on marriage, family, children with someone who is YOUR on a sensual, emotional and sexual level. Everything should be together! And for this, harmony must be within you.
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