2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Very often people complain that they cannot find friends or a partner. Everything seems to be good, and they are good people, but they do not like them. In fact, even the nicest people can have behavioral patterns that characterize them as "toxic people." For this reason, they try to avoid them. Here are their characteristics:
1. They constantly envy everyone who has, from their point of view, something better than them. They love to talk about this with others, gossip, give negative and stinging characteristics. Constantly compare themselves to others, both for the good and for the bad. The life of others worries them very much, and sometimes they completely immerse themselves in what is happening with colleagues, friends, neighbors, stars, etc. 2. Everyone in life is taken too personally. All troubles happen only to them. Anyone who says something or laughs at something, necessarily do them to harm and have them in mind. Because of this, they are offended and this makes others feel guilty, apologize or make excuses that nothing bad and personal was said. In general, they love to dramatize everything that happens to and around them. Any not very pleasant event can create drama. Some are crying, others are trying to evoke feelings of guilt in their opponents, and still others are ready to take revenge to death for an everyday trifle. They love to keep score in relationships. How much others gave and how much they need to return. The main thing is not to give too much "good", and "bad" can be given with a margin. 3. They accumulate pain, resentment and loss. Concentrate them in themselves and constantly talk about it. In general, they have negative thinking, and even turn the positive sides into bad ones. 4. Lack of emotional control and a categorical refusal to do something about it. “I am a nervous person, I can throw a tantrum or give it in the eye. This is my personality and I will not change myself. " 5. Have fairly low empathy. Some of them are too immersed in their suffering or negativity. Others believe that the experiences of others mean little. For this reason, moral standards are often violated. They do it for no particular reason, simply because they can do it. 6. Demand from others to be constantly supported and assured of their exclusivity. If others refuse to do it or do it insufficiently, then they are offended, angry. 7. They love to keep "hostages" in a relationship. If you don’t do me well, I’ll get sick and die. And everything will be on your conscience. Or you did me badly, now pay for the rest of your life. Of course, every person can have a difficult period when they need support and protection. But when the crisis is over, they behave again as before. "Toxic people" always behave like this. The fact is that many of them consider this behavior to be the norm. So it was in their family, which means that this is the usual relationship between friends, relatives, and in general with everyone who meets on the path of life. For very many, it is even useful to know that this behavior of others can be annoying and one must behave differently, and it is possible to express one's needs in other ways. And once again I emphasize that "toxic people" are not villains. They simply do not know how to cope with their problems in any other way, and cannot interact with others in other ways. However, it is quite possible to learn this.
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