How The Roles Of A Woman, Wife, Mother Killed Your Personality

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

As long as you separate the male and female roles, you are unconscious. You are unconscious as long as you identify yourself in the same way with the role of parent, boss, professor, daughter, mother, wife, actress, doctor, etc.

Mindfulness is a way out of any role. Identifying yourself with a role is locking yourself in a box.

If you are identified with the parenting role, you can seriously harm your child, especially as he grows up and no longer needs you as a parent. If you are identified with the parenting role, your life can collapse as soon as your child leaves you as an adult. If you are identified with the role of the wife, you "lock" yourself into the box: "the wife should", you lock your partner in the "box": "the man should" and you both become unhappy, instead of just loving each other as two unique personalities. You will have a lot of complaints about the man as a man and yourself as a woman, but in this play, according to the script of the roles, feelings disappear. Then you do not love the person, but only his role and the functions of this role. Moreover, if you identify with the role of wife, you can get into trouble and marry just about anyone, because in reality it is important for you to be a wife, not a person. In this case, your personality will be oppressed by your role as a wife.

Being aware is giving up roles. Being aware is not living within the framework of roles, but simply being in contact with another and not demanding or expecting anything. Isn't that what you want: to be in a relationship and still be free? So who came up with this role play for you? Who replaced love for a role?

This story began in your childhood, when dad and mom played the roles of dad and mom. The role cuts off feelings and, above all, sincere love from the human soul. And dad and mom, performing these roles, often forgot and forget that you are alive and that you have feelings in response to their words and actions. A role deprives a person of empathy and compassion, because it is just a role and anyone can play this role.

Why are there so many divorces? Because we are not looking for a person in a partner, but for a role. And if an actor plays a role not according to your script, but in his own way, you can easily replace him with another actor - just go to the registry office and delete the stamp from your passport, dismiss this artist from the role of husband and hire another. The scenery and the actors change, but the script is the same in which you are trying to drive yourself and your partner. And what is this scenario? The one that your parents imposed on you is their scenario of the relationship between the two roles of a man and a woman.

Now let's look at the parent's role again. If you are identified with this role, then as soon as a child comes into this world, your child, you start teaching him, as if you are a boss and he is a subordinate. But who told you that a parent is the one who teaches. A parent, on the contrary, learns to be sincere, honest, open, spontaneous when a child comes into his life. The child teaches the parent to discover in himself the joy, creativity and pleasure that is available only to the child. A child knows how to live, because he will find something to rejoice in in any situation. But you forgot how to do it. So where did you get the idea that you should teach your child how to live? But you, identifying with the role of a parent, arrange hell for yourself and the child: “You must, must, this is not good enough, you can do better, but look how the neighbor Petenka does it, and I, at your age, is did it excellently, and you ….

Everything! From this moment on, you, the parent, make the child unhappy and lock him in the role of a helpless child for many years. And as soon as he gives birth to his child, he will play it out, he will want to play the main role in the play and identify with the role of the main one in the relationship with the child, because, by your grace, he never managed to achieve anything in life. Being a parent is to steal happiness from yourself and your offspring. Or maybe it is he, your child, who came to teach you how to live, to remember who you really are without a role?

And again, back to the gender issue. No one has yet succeeded in playing the role of a woman, a wife, a man, a husband. Once a rehearsed performance breaks down, at the moment when the soul asks for freedom from the role cage. Hence scandals, claims, treason, divorce. Because the role imposes a framework and you live by forcing yourself with this framework. You make soup when you fall off your feet for your husband because you are in the role of wife. He drives himself to a stroke trying to support you and the kids because he's in the role of a husband. The role is violence and this is someone else's life, not yours, it is dictated to you by the primitive direction of a primitive man. And this scenario is thoughtlessly passed down from generation to generation, thereby exacerbating the suffering of humanity.

Only unconscious people need a role. Conscious enough that their soul is unique and free. A conscious person does what he wants, an unconscious person rapes himself with a role and pretends at the same time that he is happy. So how can we answer the question: "Who are you?", Besides, how can we - "mom, dad, wife, husband, child, parent, scientist, tractor driver, salesman, etc."?

Throwing away all the roles, remember your name. Name it. This is the unique you! There are no others like that on this earth! Finding yourself outside of all roles is what it means to become aware and mature.