The Curse Of Comfort

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Just as we are in the mood for exploration, we also strive to be safe, and our brains confuse safety with comfort. And comfort contributes to the fact that we are hooked. If something seems comfortable to us (something familiar, accessible, consistent), the brain signals that we feel good here. And if we perceive something as new, complex, slightly inconsistent, fear appears. Fear comes in different shapes and sizes, and sometimes in a mask (slowness, perfection, self-doubt, apologies), and says only one word "no", for example: "No, I will ruin everything", "No, I am no one there. I don’t know”,“No, it suits me”,“No, thanks, I'd rather sit here”.

This "no" is ingrained in our evolution. At a basic level, an animal has two behaviors: come and avoid. Millions of years ago, if one of the human ancestors saw something like food or the possibility of copulating, he would approach it. And if something bothered him, he avoided it.

Research shows that familiarity tendencies are noticeable in our judgments about risk. For example, people think that technology, investment, and leisure activities are less risky and complex the more familiar they seem, even if this is contrary to the facts. This explains why people are afraid to fly, although statistically the risk of dying in an accident is much higher. For most, traveling by car is a familiar activity, but traveling by plane is, to a certain extent, an unusual and unfamiliar event.

Accessibility - the level of comprehension of something - is further evidence of safety and comfort for our brains. In one study, participants were given two sets of the same instructions for the same course of action. One set was typed in an easy-to-read font, and the other in a slightly more difficult-to-read type. Participants were asked to estimate how long it would take to complete these actions. When they read the instructions in a convenient font, they said it took 8 minutes. When they read it less readable, they said that it was 16 minutes.

Our penchant for the familiar and accessible can even influence what we believe to be true: we believe more popular beliefs. The problem is that we cannot really trace how often we heard it and from whom. This means that if a simplified thought (easily accessible) is repeated often enough and we do not critically perceive it, then we can accept it as the truth.

Neuroimaging shows how we respond to the discomfort of insecurity. When we face known risks - for example, a bet whose odds can be calculated - the reward zones in the brain, especially the striatum, are very activated. And when you need to make a bet, but it is impossible to calculate the odds and make a prediction, the amygdala is strongly activated in the brain, which is associated with fear.

The curse of comfort comes down to familiar and accessible by default. And this can lead to mistakes that take our time and do not allow us to get where we want - there is not always a familiar and familiar road leading there. Every time there are gaps in knowledge, fear fills them, which overshadows the possibility of winning.

The article appeared thanks to the book "Emotional Agility" by Susan David