2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
I communicate with many women. Often, it is with those who are in long-term relationships that such dialogues are obtained:
- Relationships are not easy and difficult.
- Why do you continue to be in them then?
- No, well, there are good points. If not for them, then, of course, she would not have fought for this relationship.
- It's much easier to be alone than in a relationship.
- Why are you not alone?
- Well, I want warmth, love. And with us, everything is not always bad. We have many different enjoyable moments.
- Now there are no normal men. And the relationship itself is suffering.
- Well, you're in a relationship. How is it that there are no normal ones?
- Oh, well, I was lucky with a man.
- Then why can't others be lucky? …
- My man is far from ideal.
- Let him go. He may be liked by another. And for her, he will be the ideal.
- Nooo. He does a lot of good for me and our relationship.
Any relationship can be tricky. At least because we interact with a completely different person. It doesn't matter if it is our parents, children, brothers and sisters, friends, men and women. However, each person has his own motive, which "forces" him to enter into relationships, be in them and try to develop them.
What do all these dialogues have in common?
Attitude towards relationships (I apologize for the tautology). The negative comes to the fore. At the same time, people are motivated by positive moments.
My opinion is that we must learn to focus our minds on the beautiful.
With such an opinion on the relationship you will not go far. The first thing girls focus on is pessimism, skepticism. And the first reaction to numerous events in the relationship will be dictated by this pessimistic attitude.
Why?
Because in our brain there is such a part as the reticular formation. She acts as a filter and gives us a certain attitude towards life. However, we fill this filter ourselves. If we have more negative, pessimistic attitudes and thoughts, then this filter will give them to us. Therefore, you need to learn to shape your thoughts for your own good.
Why am I writing all this?
We cannot live without relationships. By nature, we are social individuals. Moreover, a person without a relationship disappears. Relationships are vital to us. Yes, their shape can be different. Someone has it warmer and closer, someone at a distance or with a certain space. The content and content of the relationship is also different. This is a personal matter for everyone. What works for one pair may not work for another. I always say that each couple has their own "sado-maso", ie. what is acceptable and good for them personally.
It is important to understand for yourself that relationships are good and every person needs them. If there is a partner next to you who is not ideal, not entirely normal, with whom it is difficult and unbearable, then there is a part in him that is very good with. With you is the person you need, because there was a moment when you decided to create a relationship with him. And all sorts of difficulties are part of the process. They are part of the relationship. It is impossible without them.
Change your focus. If you're in a relationship, you have a reason. Even if you say that you are because of children, material support, common living space, business, etc. Think about how many enjoyable moments you get from your partner. Believe me, girls and guys find a lot of them when you invite them to leave a relationship.
Just ask yourself a question:
Why am I in this relationship?
And answer within 15 minutes.
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