2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Once upon a time, about 5 years ago, I really believed in the destination. Vocation. Mission. In the fact that you can find that only occupation that is your own, and in which it will be good, comfortable, easy and pleasant. Well, and more money will be paid. So I thought about 5 years ago.
Since then, I have grown wiser (I hope), and have ceased to believe in destiny. Now I believe more in knowing your values very well and understanding your needs, and also sharpening your skills. And may it be happy.
And, going back to where I started it all, 5 reasons why I stopped believing in my destiny.
The first reason is historical
A century or more ago, a person, as a rule, had one activity for a lifetime. The blacksmith was a blacksmith. The king was king. Women were wives and mothers. There was no choice as such. Yes, there were exceptions, when a person from the bottom was knocked out in the nobility, but these are rather exceptions. Which prove the rule. There was no particular choice, and people did not live that long then (especially, until there were antibiotics and one could die from any cold with fever). That is, there was no time to choose. We lived as best they could with what was.
What now? Now the person has elections - I don’t want to take it. You can do whatever you want, get whatever profession you want, move wherever you want. And what happens in the end? As a result, a person who has received many choices at his disposal wants to reduce his choice to one and only option. While there can be many of them. Different. Anything. In different fields and contexts.
The second reason is child-traumatic
There is an opinion that people who are very seriously concerned about finding a purpose are childhood traumatics who lacked a mother in childhood. Or something else important from the point of view of the child. And now an adult is trying to get this important, by looking for a destination.
What I want to say. The feeling that a person wants to receive as a result of finding a purpose may come from childhood. And then you need to figure it out. And it may not be a matter of purpose at all. It may be in the children's parts. With all the ensuing consequences.
Let me summarize. I am not suggesting that this is necessarily the case. But this option is possible. It must be taken into account.
The third reason is that he who seeks will find
It so happened that I was engaged in different types of activities. I worked as a media analyst, news feed editor, translator, blog editor, sales assistant, content manager, salesperson (not for long, but it was), and so on. It didn't work out for me on purpose - the crisis helped, and it just happened.
What I want to say from all this. To understand what you like and what you don't like, you have to try. So I know for sure that news journalism is not mine (simply because I am not interested, bored, broke). And I don’t want to sell someone else’s (especially the quality of which I’m not sure). But writing articles for blogs is very much my thing. Or social networks to carry on. Or advise. And it was such that I wanted a job, but it didn’t work well. And there was something that I didn't want, but it turned out very well.
Let me summarize. It is very important to know your values and understand your needs - if you know them well, you will have to try less. But you still have to try. And a lot is revealed in the process. If you don't try, you won't know. So, to lie on the couch, dream about some kind of destiny, and then once - and everything worked out, I don't believe in this. That is, I admit that it may be so, but I don't really believe.
The fourth reason is skill
Skills are cool. And skills can help a person discover what he likes.
For example, oratory. A person does not speak in public because he does not really know how, and does not know how, because he has not tried it. How does he know if he likes to speak in public or not? Yes, out of nowhere. If he climbs onto the stage, but he has no skills, there is a risk that he will be driven off the stage (well, or they will throw tomatoes if he is less lucky). And if there is a skill, then the person may well like it. You just need to get this skill first.
Or foreign languages. How does a person know whether he will like or dislike doing translations if he does not know a single foreign language? Yes, out of nowhere.
I hated writing. For the first time in my life, when I was assigned to write the news, I just hated the one who instructed it. And she didn't write anything. I could not. Now I am writing and I like it. And I hated social networks - writing a post for me was worse than the most terrible torment. Now I run social networks and I like it.
The fifth reason is financial
Many people looking for a purpose think that a purpose will help make money. Makes making money easier. But that was not the case. Purpose may not be related to making money at all. Or it may be connected, but finding it and monetizing are completely different things. It is the same with any talents. Having talent and being able to extract money from talent are different things. The former does not necessarily imply the latter. That is, the destination can be potentially monetary, but this potential still needs to be able to translate into money.
If a person is looking for a purpose and hopes that the purpose of his money will earn, then this is a small child who is looking for a parent. Which brings us back to point # 2.
To be continued…
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