2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The characteristic signs of the weakening of the integrity of the personality are a decrease in sincerity and an increase in egocentrism. Self-centeredness is a moral problem because it forces others to be a means of satisfying a person's personal needs. Instead of considering others to be truly human beings and treating them accordingly, man sees in them only a means of achieving his goals.
Quote from the book by Karen Horney.
With selfishness, everything is clear. It is not so interesting to talk about him. But what about sincerity? In the same book, there is another snippet:
Monk: “I understand that when a lion grabs its prey, whether it be a rabbit or an elephant, it exerts its full strength; I beg you, tell me, what is this strength?"
Teacher: "In the spirit of sincerity (literally - in the power of the absence of deception)." Sincerity, i.e. the absence of deception means “the manifestation of the integrity of one's being”, technically known as “the active integrity of being … in which nothing is hidden, nothing is expressed ambiguously, nothing is wasted. When a person leads a similar lifestyle, they say that he is a golden-haired lion; he is a symbol of courage, sincerity, frankness; he is a divine man."
How do you like this definition of integrity?
He responds very much to me. I consider deception not only in relation to others, but also in relation to myself. Often, we do not notice how we deceive ourselves, making excuses in different ways.
We say “I don’t want”, but in fact we want something very much.
“I don’t like it,” but in fact we are simply afraid to reveal our feelings, since we had many different stories in the past.
Having said “it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter to me,” in reality, we shrink inside from how much the situation is of great importance to us.
I always say that the main thing is not to deceive yourself. After losing our ability to be who we are, we begin to follow the instructions of those who mold something of us, make us comfortable. We adapt to the rules of society, to “what people say”, “it’s not right”, “must be good”. In pursuit of all this, contact with our own inner world weakens, and we become more fragmented. We start to fake it, put on different masks to show our best side and hide what others are not quite comfortable with.
And what do we have as a result? - Destroyed integrity, which is then difficult to restore. (Realistically, though, and anyone can do it.) It's never too late to stop and ask yourself questions that tell you about your own sincerity.
- What questions could these be?
- Is this my true desire?
- Do I really want this?
- Why am I doing this? Etc.
Start doing this today. If you cannot do it yourself, seek help from a psychologist.
Remember to raise your children as well. The more you demand from them the realization of their unfulfilled dreams, the more you distance the child from the integrity of being. Observe what his "sincerity" and talent are. Follow its natural qualities. And let your children be golden-haired lions and lionesses.
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