2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The kid begins to want to act independently, hence the child's constant phrase "I myself". At the same time, he wants to do what his parents do, even if obviously it is not in his power. After all, his parents are an example of everything. The child has his own desires, he already understands the difference between "want" and "must".
Crisis signs 3 years
- Interest in your image in the mirror. The kid becomes concerned about how he looks and how others see him.
- Negativism. If the parents propose to do something, then the child will do exactly the opposite. Negativism is such a manifestation in the behavior of a child when he does not want to do something just because it was suggested by one of the adults. It is important to distinguish from disobedience and understand that this will pass when the crisis is over.
- Stubbornness. The child insists on something not because he wants to, but because he demanded it, he is bound by his initial decision. The personality of the child begins to manifest itself and the baby requires that his personality be taken into account.
- Obstinacy. It is close to negativism and stubbornness, but it has specific features. Obstinacy is more generalized and more impersonal. This is a protest against the order that exists at home: against the norms of upbringing, a way of life that took shape before three years.
- Self-will. Desire will separate from the parents. This is not the kind of separation that takes place during the crisis of 14 years, but the beginnings are being formed now. The child himself wants to do something. It is about the independence of intention, design.
- Devaluation of adults: The child begins to swear, tease, and name the parents.
- Rebellion protest, which manifests itself in frequent quarrels with parents. A child in a state of war and conflict with others.
- Striving for despotism. The child forces the parents to do whatever he requires. In relation to younger sisters and brothers, despotism manifests itself as jealousy.
Advice for parents. How to help your baby get through the crisis:
1. Be softer and more patient in upbringing, give your child more freedom and the right to choose, give up overprotection.
2. Adhere to the same parenting tactics. It is imperative that Mom and Dad are on the same page. Discuss your views on certain issues with your spouse in advance, and present the same requirements to the child.
3. If the child has a flash of anger, tears, tantrums, show calmness and patience. Do not allow yourself to scream and freak out in response, if the child sees your calmness, he will quickly calm down in response. The child must see that screaming, crying and hysterics will not be able to manipulate the parents. Children who are hysterical should not be punished. Your screaming and swearing will only intensify the tantrum. The child himself will calm down when he realizes that his tears do not work on you.
4. Try not to argue with your child. Do not try to break his stubbornness by force. Remember the child is testing you. Previously, the child was allowed almost everything, but now much is prohibited, as a result of which the child is trying to build a new system of relationships with adults and the world around him. The child learns from the parents to defend their point of view, independence.
5. Do not command your child! He will not tolerate this. This will only lead to nervous tension.
Give the child the opportunity to be independent (for example, dress and undress himself, let him decide whether to eat now or not, do not hold the table by force. Give him simple tasks: water the flowers, set the table, sweep the floor, etc.)
6. Give in on the little things. If a child wants to eat the second one at lunch, and then the soup, let him, nothing terrible will happen. Seek compromises and give your baby choices.
7. Remember, any overprotectiveness kills the child's initiative. Offer your child your help, do not do everything for him.
eight. Show your child your love, praise more often, hug him. Your toddler may decide that you do not like him if you constantly scold him for his misdeeds, for example, for accidentally breaking a cup or spilling soup. A child at this age is not yet able to distinguish between your attitude towards his specific actions and the general attitude towards him personally. Calmly explain to the child why he is wrong, why it is bad. In order not to reinforce the guilt complex in the child, do not shout at him.
9. You should not give the child general assessments, such as: "bungler", "bad-handed", etc. Your accidentally thrown words can hurt the child and serve as the basis for further psychological problems. 10. Maintain the confidence in the child that he can do everything himself: "Well done, you almost succeeded, let me help you a little, and together we will do everything right."
Crisis 3 years in children - this is a period of serious testing for parents. Remember that you, too, were once children. If it is difficult for you to cope with the child's behavioral manifestations alone, do not delay, sign up for a consultation, and you will understand how to behave with your child specifically. Together we will find a way to survive this crisis.
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