2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
In some cases, a person cannot get rid of obsessive memories and reflections about his past, trying to find some kind of justification for what is happening, to give the events of life some meaning. One way to use this energy constructively is to try to describe your life story by remembering all of its main events and expressing your attitude towards them.
Those who have tried to write their biographies report strong feelings and "insights", as well as some relief from re-living and reflecting on painful periods in their lives. There is evidence that writing painful experiences can be a way to cope with life crises, difficult dilemmas, and conflict. A written story can change a person's attitude to their experiences.
There is one caveat when writing an autobiography. If the memory of a painful event makes you very agitated (re-traumatizes), then you should seek the help of a psychologist with whom you can share painful experiences.
The purpose of writing an autobiography may be to strive to understand the impact of your family and childhood on your current life, the desire to get in touch with inner forces and find resources, to revive the source of strength and love. You can start your autobiography from any episode or period in your life. There are no rules here. Those who love “everything in order” can start with the earliest childhood memories and move on consistently. You can start with a strong emotional event in your life. Do not forget that important factors in the development of a person can be something that did not happen to him: lack of love, friends, parents who did not pay enough attention to your hobbies and achievements, the absence of someone with whom to share experiences …
Approximate algorithm for writing an autobiography
Birth story. What do you know about your parents' dating history? Who used to tell you about it? Were you a welcome child? What do you know about this? Did your gender match your parents' expectations? What do you know about your mother's pregnancy and what was your mother's condition after you were born? What kind of child are you with your parents? How did your father take part in your development in the first year of your life? Which of your loved ones or other people were with you in the first year of your life? How often did you get sick in your early childhood? How did your family feel about your illnesses?
Family history. What events happened in your family when you were a child? Do you have brothers or sisters, and if so, what is the age difference between you? How did your family overcome crises? Who in your family made the main decisions? What customs and traditions distinguished your family from other families you know. What was the emotional atmosphere in your family? Who provided financial support for your family? How open was your family to other people: how often did guests visit you, how often did your family visit family friends? How often did conflicts arise in your family? Who initiated them? How did they end? What was your role during the conflicts? Are there any family secrets that you are privy to? Are there any secrets that you know exist despite the family's efforts to keep you from them?
Children's fantasies. Have you created your own imaginary world at one time or another in your childhood? In what period of childhood did you feel especially good in your imaginary world? Describe this imaginary world, what characters inhabited it, and what were their functions? At what age did childhood fantasies leave you? What do you think of your childhood fantasies today?
Unusual children's ideas. Many had unusual ideas and beliefs in childhood, for example, about who your real parents are, where children come from, what death is, why parents fought.
Your childhood self-image. How did you feel about yourself as a child, how did you assess your abilities, what did you think and feel about your shortcomings? How did you become aware of their existence? How did other people react to you (trust, criticize, compete …)? How other people perceived you, for example, parents, grandparents, other relatives, persons of the opposite sex, teachers, your peers. Were you a child who could stand up for himself, express his opinion, show leadership qualities? In what form did you manage to implement this?
Significant others from your parental family and in later life. Describe the nature of your relationship with each of the people that matter to you, early memories, and your feelings then and now.
How are you and how are you different from your parents and other family members? Which member of your family do you resemble in appearance or character traits? What are these similarity parameters? How do you feel about your similarity: are you proud, ashamed? How do you feel about your differences from the rest of the family?
Family relationships. What was the relationship between your parents like? Can you remember periods when you were strongly attached to one parent and jealous of the other? Who were you most attached to in your family and why? What has changed over time in your attitude towards your parents when you learned something new about them? How did your parents feel about you and your siblings? Was there a rivalry between you and your siblings? How was it expressed? What did your parents do while doing this?
Disease and death. What do you remember about your own illnesses and those of your loved ones? When did you first face death? How did you feel when you received the news of death? Who shared your feelings of loss with you?
Hobbies and hobbies. What were your hobbies as a child? Who supported you in your hobby and was interested in it? How are your childhood hobbies present in your adult life?
Sexual story. What early stories about sexuality do you remember? How did you find out about the sexual side of your parents' life and how did you react to it? What attitudes towards sex, your own and the opposite sex did you have in childhood and how did they change over time? How did your parents feel about sexuality? From what sources did you receive information about the sexual side of life? What was the content of your first sexual fantasies? How did you experience the changes caused by puberty? How do you remember your sexual debut: what preceded it, what happened later, what thoughts and feelings did the first sexual experience evoke? Do you like feeling sexually attractive?
Experience of achievement. Describe the three best experiences in your life when you achieved remarkable results, surpassed yourself, or were simply lucky.
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