The Day You Will Be Happy

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

How long have you felt happy? Maybe now or yesterday, a week ago? … What was you doing at that moment? Did you think at that moment that you were happy?

When you go about your daily activities, keeping up with the frantic pace of life, you probably don't ask - are you happy at the moment? Someone will say that for complete happiness you need an "apartment", "a car", "money", preferably "a lot of money", "favorite job", "lose weight", "enlarge your lips, or better chest", "and indeed, who is happy now - everyone has problems! ". Every day you do some kind of routine, go to the same job, while forcing yourself to do something without the necessary motivation, you promise yourself a reward - “Now I'll finish it until Friday, and go to a bar, relax, have a drink … "," Now I will lose weight, and I will be popular with men "," Now I will do this "unloved thing" (your version) and buy myself …. (here again your version) ". And so over and over again, from business to business, which does not bring pleasure, but only a temporary state of happiness, in the form of a "dubious reward." And that very self-satisfaction or the desired outcome of events - alas … never comes!

The plastic surgeon M. Moltz, who spent many years eliminating the defects in the appearance of his patients, revealed one simple pattern - the majority of patients believed that if they correct the physical defects of their face or body, they will immediately acquire what, in their opinion, will make them happy. That their lives would change instantly, things would improve. In fact, the problem lies much deeper. In addition to the bodily face and the body given to us by nature, there is a "face", a psychological and internal state of comfort. By changing the shape of your ears or nose, but leaving the image of yourself unchanged, you can run into a new personality crisis - a crisis of mismatch between the physical and psychological comfort of your own “I”.

There are several ways to maintain an inner state of happiness and comfort. First, before you do something, ask yourself: Do I really want to do this? Why am I doing this? Will it bring me pleasure? Is this business worth the "price" that will have to be paid to achieve the goal? Is this my goal / desire or is it imposed by someone? To stop depending on the goals of society, it is important to build your own system of goals, independent of the opinion of the majority or imposed from outside. Provided that the goal is chosen correctly and there is a determination not to give up at the first difficulties, there is a high concentration on your actions, you simply will not have time to be unhappy.

Secondly, in the process of achieving a goal / desire, on the way to it, at some point you may stop enjoying the process. Focusing on a goal that is located in the future, you can lose the ability to be happy "here and now." Try to enjoy every step of the way to your goal. Thirdly, in order to achieve a state of happiness, it is necessary to learn how to form and maintain rewards within oneself, to develop the ability to experience joy regardless of the surrounding circumstances. And by tying yourself to the system of "rewards" and "punishments" you can get dependent on other people's opinions and stereotypes. Constant excessive "rewards" in the form of delicious food, alcohol, drugs, constant shopping is a loss of control over your life, fear of taking responsibility for it. And this, in turn, leads to an internal conflict between desires and goals.

To learn to be happy, you need to enjoy and see the meaning of life in life itself as a value. You can endlessly suffer and say that “life”, “society” or “your version” is not fair in relation to you, but you can see the task by your goals that you can achieve by YOURSELF.

Now imagine when your life will be happy? What will this day be like? Will you wake up in the morning or will it be closer to noon? Where will you wake up? At home, or will it be in the summer at the dacha, or will it be a hotel room overlooking the sea or ocean? When you imagine waking up, how will you feel your body? What will give you a feeling of physical comfort and pleasure? If you open your eyes, what will you see around you? What walls, what kind of ceiling or what kind of sky? Will you be alone or will you feel the warm breath of someone next to you? How will you start this morning of yours, the morning of the happy day of your life? When, at what time do you decide to get up and how do you do it? How will you start your lucky day? Tell us about a house where you can live happily - dream! Tell us about your breakfast … How are you going to work - or are you not working? What will your day be about? How would you like to complete it, with whom, in a large company, in a close circle, next to your loved one - or maybe you would like to end the day by being alone with yourself? Perhaps you will feel that different days can be happy for you. You always have the opportunity to compose several stories about the day when you will be happy!