2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
How infinitely lonely we are …
And how we do not want to see this - we are making efforts, wasting mental energy, closing our eyes with all our might …
I'm talking about that kind of loneliness, when with all your soul and body, you feel that you are alone in the entire Universe. Alone with your inner world, your experiences, worries, sorrows, problems, crises. With everything that only you can handle yourself, no one will come to the rescue and will not survive all this for you.
Now there are so many assistive devices and possibilities to keep your eyes closed and maintain the illusion that you are not alone. An illusion - because another person, work, knowledge, relationships - anything that can be used as a blindfold - will not fill the spiritual void. It is formed in the place where there should be a part of ourselves, the one that we reject, refuse to see and accept. It can be not only loneliness, anything that we do not want to feel and feel in ourselves.
We are so arranged that until we are ready to get acquainted with something inside ourselves, we will make a huge amount of effort in order to avoid this meeting. The psyche works like that. She does not like changes, she loves harmony and peace. This is just the case when a bad peace is better than a good war, and all sorts of excitement associated with self-knowledge for the psyche, something annoying that needs to be eliminated and returned again to a state of peace of mind.
So that's about loneliness. Something I was distracted. You see, it is not so easy to write about loneliness, even if you have already managed to touch it in your soul, look into this abyss and give it the opportunity to look into you.
As a rule, any awareness is accompanied by mental pain and acute bitterness. It is the experience of these feelings that we avoid, pretending that we are not alone, that we do not need to change anything in ourselves, attracting the outside world to help.
And these feelings are like a cleansing fire, behind them is the growth of the personality, its growing strength, because these are very valuable acquisitions, these are treasures. And who said that treasures should be obtained without effort? Easily? Without labor and effort, it’s not treasure - it’s not value - it cannot be appropriated and used.
Realizing himself lonely, accepting his loneliness and grieving about it, a person stops looking for fillers of spiritual voids in the outside world.
A person gets independence! For example, it is one thing when you enter into a relationship because you are interested with this person, you like him as a person, you see his otherness, and it is quite another thing when this person is entrusted with the mission of saving you from loneliness, filling with yourself emptiness. Not only is this a great responsibility, but it also makes you vulnerable and dependent on him - after all, he is the guarantor that you are, as it were, not alone.
A person begins to live differently. The quality of his life is changing. Work, food, relationships, sports, everything that was supposed to create and maintain the illusion of not being alone is now being used for a different purpose - to bring joy and pleasure into life.
Psychotherapy helps you gain strength to meet your inner outcasts, recognize them, hear, see, meet and accept.
Independence and freedom are worth giving up the illusions that separate a person from real life.
But this is everyone's choice and right!
Sincerely yours, Karine Kocharyan
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