2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Once a friend of mine gave me a photo frame that reads: "Friends are the family we create ourselves."
We are comfortable with our friends, because we are similar in interests, worldview, values. We are unlikely to choose a person who transcends our boundaries or is insensitive to our experiences. Also, we will not become friends with those who are not pleasant to us, not pleasant, with whom there is no contact.
Remember the saying: tell me who your friend is, and I will tell you who you are? They also say that the people around us are our mirrors. Most often, we hear these phrases in a somewhat negative context, and do not notice at all that we reflect to our friends what we are similar in, and thanks to which we are attracted.
What do you value most about your friends?
Here's my list:
The ability to sincerely rejoice for success, results, travel, achievements, new purchases
Of course, (as without it) support in difficult times
I really appreciate their support in any of my ideas and endeavors. “Don't give up”, “don't be afraid”, “go ahead”, “don't give up” - these phrases are like a balm for the soul. It’s not for nothing that they say that friends should be as crazy as we are
We are developing together. At the same time, each in his own way, and this makes our communication even more interesting
Openness and sincerity. Willingness to discuss everything, the more we strengthen our friendship
Our main value is the desire to be friends. This helps to overcome various unpleasant situations and discuss them
My friends know what I like and often give me nice gifts
They can trust me with their children
They help me in everyday life: prepare for the move, prepare a new house for living
They can make a surprise - fly from another country for my birthday
Together we can be silent, sing songs, dance on the streets of Venice (and not only); cry over something that touched us; go to church together for service; look for a dentist in a foreign country; find a drink that we really like and drink it, remembering each other, while being at the same time several hundred thousand kilometers from each other. And a lot of other things
Why am I sharing this with you and what does it have to do with psychology?
I had 2 goals:
Remember pleasant moments with friends. Interesting stories from life. Feel their support, friendly rear. Understand that in some ways you are not alone in this world, especially in the sense of crazy ideas. Perhaps, mentally running through your life with friends, you will see those whom you have not seen for a long time, or it will push you on some new adventure, a new tradition between you. One way or another, when we remember pleasant moments, we want repetition. We are starting to embody this. Therefore, the goal number 1 is pleasant emotions in the circle of friends (to feel them again and / or to repeat them in a real meeting).
By describing the values that are important to you in your friends, you can look at what kind of friend and person you are. Everything that you paid attention to is in yourself, it is you. Therefore, goal # 2 shows how valuable you are. Looking at yourself through your friends, and realizing what traits are in you, your self-esteem and self-worth will strengthen internally and give you a lot of positive emotions.
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