2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The hardest thing, perhaps, is to part with the past. Even with illusions, but everyone probably leaves them at least once in a lifetime (I have never met adults who believe in Santa Claus). But it is not easy to say goodbye to the past. At least because to part with him you need to have something to fill the present
For example, there are people calling streets with old names. Somewhere there, on Proletarsky Boulevard, they walked until dawn after graduation, the best school years passed on Sverdlov, and the first kiss happened on Ton Duc Thana Lane. And all these names, pronounced so stubbornly and evilly to the rapidly changing present, do not sound at all from the fact that it is difficult to learn new ones, because they will remember the necessary numbers in the payroll and the increase in water tariffs without difficulty, as the date of their own birth. But because they do not want to call them differently and are not ready.
The ex-husband can be left in the past only when he ceases to be more important than oxygen, and until then it is simply physically impossible. You can stop worrying about your son only if there is something else in life besides him, anything: from work, which brings joy, to a new hobby, which at 55 you no longer think to meet.
Rejection of the past is not always a matter of "want or not want" choice. It is more often a question of one's own safety, that is, literally: "will I survive or not." You will not tell (I hope) a person on dialysis: "stop whining, let's get a kidney transplant!" Because, firstly, any operation can be fatal and this is scary. Secondly, there is always a risk that the kidney, even if it is found on time, will not take root and it will be wasted time, money and effort, which are already scarce. Thirdly, this choice (to try or give up) of everyone personally and it is foolish to demand from the other what he is simply not capable of.
We keep old traditions for many reasons. Some have a magical protective function, protecting such a ringing void from existential rustle. Others are dear to us as memory and they remain so in spite of all the progress that is marching forward, because as before - they give a dull pain in the distant corners of the soul. And the third become fake, creating only the illusion of significance and fullness of meaning where their own meanings simply did not appear.
With some we are afraid to part, because we do not know what to put in their place. Some simply cannot be erased from life, because they literally hold on to - everything. And then fanaticism in whatever way protects from disintegration into small pieces, from the loss of one's own meaning, from the fragility of one's own identity.
All the flowers laid at the Eternal Flame every year are divided into two musical modes: minor (quiet and sad, with grateful silence) and major (with a bunch of exclamation marks and ribbons in their hair rejoicing from their own psychosis). For the first, this is a terrible story that has remained in the past and smacks of pain and memory; for others, it is a hysterical act of mental vandalism, woven from the megalomania of someone else's grandeur and their own cast-iron illusions.
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