2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The world of each individual person consists of microsystems: educational institutions, work collective, family, friends, business partners, relatives and other environment that we periodically find ourselves in.
I believe that it is very important for psychological well-being to find the microenvironment that accepts you. A single person can be such a microenvironment.
It so happens that, getting into one environment, we feel that this environment rejects us, and another environment provides acceptance. It's like in botany - each type of plant needs a certain soil (some plants can grow only in black soil, others are suitable for loam). The embryo also needs a special environment. It also happens that the mother's environment rejects the fetus and the embryo does not take root.
Therefore, it is very important for a person to find an environment that will accept and nourish him. Sometimes this search takes many years.
You can find your environment only thanks to your intuition, feelings, understanding of what I really need, where I am going, where I will be comfortable, where I can fully open up and realize my potential.
In due time, I changed many types of activities in search of myself. This one was like trying on clothes - some sat unprepossessing, embarrassed or shapeless, as if from someone else's shoulder, and some lay down very comfortably, like your own skin. I tried my hand at journalism, sociology, marketing, advertising and design until I came to psychology. Actually, all of these areas are somehow related to psychology. They were the steps that formed my further path, and now they help me, although they are not the main profession.
At one time, I talked a lot with top managers, entrepreneurs who were also looking for their niche and developed. Few of them stayed in one position for more than a year. In the words of one top manager: "If I was not promoted every year, I left this job, because I needed to develop and move on." But it's not at all a fact that your environment is career growth. Some are more comfortable in a predictable, unchanging environment.
I don't go to classmates' meetings because I just don't know what I will talk about with them when I meet. This is not because I extol myself, oppose myself, or have a modest vocabulary in addition to social phobia, but because this is not my environment.
As a typical introvert, I was burdened by the need to be in this team and communicate with these people, with whom I did not see any points of contact, no common topics and interests, with the exception of individuals. I had my own not a poor inner world, many hobbies, hobbies, I could always perfectly occupy myself and loneliness never bothered me.
Now I am happy for the children whose parents can provide them with family education. Although someone feels great in a school environment, in large companies.
Analyzing my life, I understand that I gradually created an environment for myself in which I would be as comfortable as possible. Actually, this is the goal of our life - to find ourselves and provide comfort. I'm not even talking about material comfort, but about psychological.
To create such comfort for yourself, you need to get rid of unnecessary things, not waste your emotions, time and money on things that do not contribute to the achievement of the goal and do not bring joy. In this regard, we can cite the following metaphor: you have a piece of shapeless clay, and in order to make the sculpture you need from it, you need to cut off all unnecessary things. And to cut off, you need to know what you are "sculpting".
Through such analysis and cutting off the excess, the formation of their individualism, spiritual development and harmonization of life takes place.
I liked the quote from a girl from the forum who realized that she didn’t live the life she wanted: “My name is in a world that I don’t need. As if I’m trying to integrate myself into a puzzle that initially doesn’t suit me.”
So should you force yourself to fit into this puzzle?
There are no unformatted people, there is simply not your format.
Elena Burkova
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