What Does A Psychotherapist Do In A Session?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

What does the therapist do in the session? Many people have the wrong opinion that the therapist just sits and listens to their stories about internal experiences, feelings, problems. As a result, they cannot even understand what they paid the money for, because they could share their feelings with loved ones! Without knowing what the psychotherapist's job is, it is easy to draw a false conclusion.

So what does the work of a therapist imply? The answer to this question lies in just three words - setting, holding, containment.

Setting - adherence to certain attitudes and boundaries in a psychotherapy session.

Containment is the therapist's emotional restraint in relation to the feelings and emotions of clients. Each of us has personal traumas associated with family relationships (for example, our parents were intolerant of our antics, did not perceive our real individuality, all the time they stopped emotional outbursts of anger, unrestrained fun (Sit and do not rock the boat!), Hysterics with tears (Go cry, then you'll come back!), sometimes even weak attempts at self-realization in life). In the case of the therapist, everything is simple - he is there, in direct contact with the client, will not give up and will not do anything to stop the flow of emotions. If you want to cry - cry, if you want to be angry - swear! The therapist will endure everything and will be able to understand all the deepest feelings of the client.

Holding - in other words, the psychotherapist's internal analysis of the behavior, emotional outburst and general condition of the client. All these factors are somehow connected with his problems in life. In order to understand exactly how, the therapist needs to listen to the person to the end.

At the moment when the client is ready to listen, perceive and be aware of what he has heard, the psychotherapist offers certain hypotheses and interpretations of his behavior. All discussions are held exclusively in a kind manner and only when a person is psychologically ready to hear facts that are sometimes painful for himself - this is the only way not to harm his self-esteem, not to hurt his pride and feelings. The main task of the therapist is not to hurt, but to create a psychological state of frustration in communication (a situation of an alleged discrepancy between desires and available opportunities). To some extent, the situation can be traumatic - disappointment, a strong psychological blow. However, the psychotherapist observes the so-called "principle of usefulness" for the client - the situation should in no case destroy the person's morale, it should serve as an impetus for improving life.

To accomplish this task, the therapist observes the client's psycho-emotional state, his behavior, helps to verbalize emotions, experiences, psychosomatic manifestations. This alone helps a person at least 50% understand himself and get rid of difficulties. When any of us can clearly and intelligibly state our point of view to the interlocutor, this significantly helps in life.

By analyzing the client's behavior, the psychotherapist forms a connection between the present and the past, draws parallels, traces the pattern and establishes the relationship between childhood and adult life. As a result, a certain strategy of behavior is formed, which is based on all the observations and character of a person. However, sometimes a minimum of 10 sessions may be needed for clarity of action.

The most difficult stage in psychotherapy is dealing with the client's resistance. A person cannot cope with these manifestations on his own. People who are independently searching for their inner "I", in fact, are on the way to self-destruction. Only thanks to the support, special knowledge of the therapist and, if desired, a person can bypass his defense mechanisms and carefully immerse himself in the psyche. The main goal of the psychotherapist at this stage is to lead the client by the hand to the very bottom of his soul, fix the "problems" in the system and return safe and sound and confident that he has become stronger and can cope with various difficulties. After that, in no case should the sessions be interrupted - it is necessary to form protective mechanisms of a higher order, adapted to the life of the individual.

The process of intervention in the human psyche resembles a surgical operation. If the patient has problems with the heart or heart valve, the surgeon must cut, carry out the necessary treatment and suture. So it is in psychotherapy. However, here it is impossible to take impudently and immediately cut. In this case, the defense mechanisms are the human body, and it must open on its own. You need to be psychologically prepared to bypass this defense mechanism and penetrate. The soul is much more difficult to "repair" than to undergo heart surgery - in total, this is one procedure. They did it, and the person moved on. With protective mechanisms, preliminary preparation is needed to get through them, and support to "sew" a healed soul. This part of the work resembles a fossil layer and can sometimes take a year or two, depending on the rigidity of the client's psyche (if the psyche is not flexible, it will take a little more time to penetrate into the depths of a person's consciousness).

Thus, sometimes the task of the therapist is not to do anything, but to be fully involved in the communication process. Where did people get such a false idea of the work of a psychotherapist? The thing is that it is customary in society to respond to emotional outbursts - to give advice, take a hand, sympathize, console or get angry. However, in moments of suffering, a person does not always want exactly the response from his interlocutor - sometimes it is enough for someone to just stay there and share the pain.

Why do we get angry when we can't help? This is a kind of defensive reaction so as not to feel powerless. Very often in couples, when one partner starts to complain about something, the other gets irritated, nervous, freaked out, and sometimes goes berserk. What is the reason for this reaction? He simply cannot help his soul mate in any way, although he is trying in every possible way. This unconscious powerlessness makes him feel stupid, humiliated, insulted, and the inner voice repeats: "I am so worthless that I can not help you!" After this manifestation of an imbalance with oneself, a defensive reaction occurs - anger and fury, which result in uncontrollable and offensive words: "Are you tired (a), how long can you tell the same thing?" The psychotherapist does not get tired of listening to everything several times, he is familiar with powerlessness, he sees the mistakes and oversights of a person from the outside, but he cannot live his life for the client.

Take one small step and everything will be fine. It would seem simple, but for a person this is not a small step at all, it is a huge step. Therefore, the task of the therapist is to contain this powerlessness, to be close to the client until he has developed enough energy and resources for him to stand up and take this step on his own. Sometimes such a process takes a short period of time and is given with ease, sometimes - powerlessness forces a person to make certain efforts to overcome boundaries.

Thanks to the special dialogue that the psychotherapist possesses, the client learns to communicate with another self, with his inner self, in a positive and warm way. It is this approach that provides positive shifts and improvements in life. Why? After all, each of us spends with ourselves an unlimited amount of time - 24/7, and these dialogues never stop. A positive factor for the further development of any person is the desire to let in, accept and absorb the skills of contact with the therapist and make them a style of communication with your “I”.