2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Aggression is not necessarily anger. In psychology, aggression is the life force that pushes you forward to achieve success, your needs and goals; this is what helps us to act, to realize our plans.
What psychological factors contribute to a low level of aggression?
- Low self-confidence, lack of self-confidence. If a person does not believe that he is worthy to get something in life (a good partner, a prestigious job, a decent life, a comfortable and not hungry life, a good rest, etc.), he simply will not do anything to realize what he wants. Or it will be, but at a low level of energy, and in the end it will not reach realization (as a result, by such actions, a person will only prove to himself - "I cannot! This life is not for me!"). Accordingly, first of all, you need to pump self-confidence - you deserve everything that other people do.
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Relationship with the father. Why with your father? All the objects of affection that raised you (mom, dad, grandmothers, grandfathers, aunts, uncles, neighbors, etc.) are represented in your psyche. The two fundamental parts of our psyche are mother and father. In this case, if you are angry or offended by your father, and your father is part of your psyche, then you are angry with yourself. If mom gives us desires and needs in life, so that we are kindled, want to live, want to get something, then dad gives us strength, energy and aggression in order to realize what we want, to act and get the best in life.
An important point - this does not mean at all that with an alcoholic father you will not be able to achieve anything. The most important thing is not to deny your father's part within yourself. Your negative attitude towards your father inside is your negative attitude towards your aggression.
- Psychological, sexual or physical abuse during childhood. In this case, the human psyche moves along one of two paths - either the state of the victim, or the state of the attack and the sadist. Just in case, a person will strongly defend himself deliberately, in advance, just in case, attack others so that he is not offended.
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Formation of guilt. The institution of our life (state, parents, upbringing in school, kindergarten, religion) is designed in such a way that we are forced to suppress our aggressive and sexual instincts. It is in this way that it is most convenient for us to manipulate, keep in check, manage. On the one hand, this way we can coexist together in society, but on the other hand, an internal personal conflict arises.
What is guilt from the point of view of psychology and psychotherapy? This is anger directed at oneself (in other words, someone initially made you angry, the person could not be presented with anything, and you left everything in yourself, pointing at yourself). If you feel guilty about your mom, dad, grandparents now, realize that you were angry, and that anger is still there. You need to unfold the emotion - to understand where it comes from, when it began, how you can act now so that there is no pain.
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Incomplete separation from parents (typical for 90% of people). Perhaps there was no violence or something painful, but the separation did not happen. Most often this happens if the child was overprotective - both while small, and when an adult ("Let me tie your laces, let's do this together, let's do this …"). In fact, you do not have time to make a decision, take responsibility for your life and manage it yourself - your mom, grandmother, sometimes dad or grandfather always managed to do everything for you. In this case, you do not feel strong enough to cope with life, respectively, and your aggression is at a low level. What to do? To work on separation from parental figures, not to be afraid of mistakes in adulthood, to pump up faith in yourself and your strength.
An increase / decrease in the level of aggression is also influenced by diseases, hormones, some situational moments when you are in too much pain.
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