2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
In this article, I would like to talk about why it is so important to work with your negative feelings and emotions, to live them and let them go, making room for new events in your life.
“I am alone, on my own. They will betray you anyway. I drank enough. One (friend) in my office took the director's purse away, another slept with my woman, the third only drank vodka with me … Too often they wiped their feet on me …
I loved her, the story is complex, 10 years younger than me. At first he did not love, then he did not know life. And then she said: "Who are you to me" … 7 years have passed. Yes, I already forgot, only a sediment remained. I didn’t say so - I didn’t forget, of course, I just became different inside, probably a cynic, and somehow I began to look at women in a very different way …"
Sergey (name has been changed), whom we met on a dating site, told me about his story. There was a lot of pain in his story, complaints about women, friends, parents, brother, government and the whole world. And there were also memories of past achievements. All conversations are only about the past: about achievements, defeats, love, betrayal, but about the real life of today, and even more so about the future - practically nothing …
- I am a construction engineer. Graduated from UPI, school of the Olympic reserve, music school in the piano class. By military specialty, lieutenant, company commander of engineering troops. Father is an engineer at a defense plant, mother is a music teacher. I did not have a childhood: training for 4-6 hours and a music room, homework, and even the school increased with lessons. I ate on the bus while driving from one place to another. You played with rubber bands, and I fell to sleep dead …
- Do you like your job, tell me honestly?
- Honestly not, but when I entered the 92nd there was such a mess. I hoped that while I was studying, the country would want to build, from which I gained knowledge honestly and without cronyism. And when he defended his diploma and was ready to sell all kinds of crap like "Herbalife", I found an office where a designer was needed …
- What do you think now? What would you like to do?
- So I don't know how to build facades for shopping malls. I can turn the steering wheel B, C categories … I want to go where the brain is needed. But the employer does not want to pay for the brain, he wants to buy a car for himself. Or daughter in honor of graduation. Who needs me? In 10 minutes I will calculate the bearing profile, there is a program, make a report both for money and for construction, and a warehouse, and an order for a shortage, and cutting by elements …
- Everyone creates their own reality. Do you like living in your own world?
- Not really, but I can't afford another. Everyone has a predetermined fate, and how he fulfills it - he will go his own way …
My world began at the age of 4, when my ancestors bought me the first construction set, and I read and wrote sloppily. Well, then you know: sports, music, UPI, unemployment, engineering, betrayal of a woman, buying real estate, again unemployment. Yes, somewhere in the middle, the rank of lieutenant. So I have no golden mountains. That's my whole world: rock music and poking around the Internet … …
Yes, no heh … does not depend on us. If you do not know - what is foreordained from above will happen … I know what I need, but others do not need it … I cannot understand one thing: the girl swore to me in love, and immediately cheated on me. Do you think she's right?
It hurts, but nothing can be done, I am ready to give my life for her. And then there were women besides her, but everything was not right. Apparently everyone has a thread. Cut off for 3 seconds and forever. And you mean my world …
Each person in his life is faced with various traumatic situations, and this is inevitable: the loss of loved ones (death or breakup), betrayal, betrayal, a long-term serious illness of loved ones, serious financial losses for various reasons, and much more. It seems to them that all possible life trials fall on some people, and everyone reacts to them differently: someone withdraws into themselves, “freezes” their emotions and feelings so as not to experience mental pain, becomes cold and detached. Someone becomes a complainer, a grumbler, eternally dissatisfied with life and blaming everyone around for their problems.
Someone “puts on a mask of joy”, reads positive affirmations, rejoices at everything that gives him life, not allowing negative emotions to manifest in his mind, and violently suppresses any “bad” thought and emotion in himself about the events around. These people have different tactics for avoiding their pain, but none of them can "cure" this pain.
I really want to help Sergei sincerely and unselfishly. Seeing how a person with great potential practically abandons his life, remaining in the memories of his past, it is impossible to remain aloof.
Most people who have been depressed for years cease to adequately assess their life, the situation around them, and cannot honestly admit to themselves, and many do not understand that the world around them is only their subjective perception. That the pain with which they have lived, paints their world in dark, hopeless tones. They can no longer notice the opportunities and gifts that life offers them. They do not see and do not attract positive and open people to themselves, because they think and feel on a different, negative wave.
But what about those "positivists" who say affirmations and look at the world through rose-colored glasses? They should be fine in life, they are on a positive wave!
Unfortunately no. They are in exactly the same negative perception of the world, but they do not notice this, since they have hidden all their pain deep in their hearts and in the subconscious. But this pain continues to destroy them from the inside, creating various diseases in the body, and, more often, neoplasms, so that a person finally draws attention to himself and honestly and seriously deals with his sores …
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