2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
All the way through my psychological practice (with all the understanding of the phenomenon described below) I never cease to be amazed at the inconsistency of a particular phenomenon …
A person, launched into a certain coordinate system by the influence of his trauma, desperately needs favorable circumstances - he is looking for the return of psychological pain, feeling uncomfortable, lost outside the suffering fetters …
At first glance, it is logically inverted by the phenom: a person does not run from suffering - to new torment … But quite characteristic, well-known …
Recently, I worked with a woman who, in a therapeutic analysis, clearly formulated the logic of the previous, regular PA. In comprehending this topic, she suddenly clearly realized: her anxiety was growing in too even and harmonious (unusual for her history) circumstances. Falling into folding and easy situations, the client (by means of alarming PAs) unconsciously returned herself to the painfully familiar Hell - understandable and dear from childhood. And then her life became not alien, but completely familiar and very, very own, although it caused a lot of suffering …
And today she consulted a girl who, after the tragic (unlived to the end) death of her mother, was unable to participate in a long-term relationship of happy, genuine acceptance. By all means, she needed to re-experience the grievous loss of a partner, and therefore (as they say, "not knowing what she was doing") either left at the peak of the relationship herself, or attracted unreliable and immature partners to herself, over and over again plunging oneself into painfully familiar Hell - irreversible parting, painful loss of a dear, loved one …
Such phenomena are called in psychology the phenomenon of psyche retraumatization.
A person unconsciously returns himself to a sick mental situation in order to cope, overcome, so to speak, close his injury, but similar circumstances lead to the same results, only exacerbating the damage …
This is how an unprocessed trauma launches distorted paths of further, luring a person into an unfavorable psychological reality - the "Kingdom of Crooked Mirrors", the path from which is not easy, not quick and unclear, and without a special assistant in the person of a psychologist, it is often irreversible …
Still, the first thing to do in a similar crisis situation is to confidently remind yourself: “I am more than my injury! And stronger than their problems! So, I will certainly overcome, I can handle it, I can!”. One has only to enlist professional support and consciously step towards your problem.
Remember: there are no unsolvable problems, every algorithm has its own solutions.
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