2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Envy is an unjust passion, because as about vipers they say that they are born, gnawing through the womb that gives birth to them, so envy usually devours the soul, which is tormented by it. St. Basil the Great
According to Klein, envy is the first manifestation of aggression in a child's life. She defines jealousy as the tendency to enter into a hostile relationship with a good object rather than a terrifying bad persecutor.
An envious person is ill at the sight of pleasure. He only feels good when others are suffering. Therefore, all attempts to satisfy the envious person are in vain. We can say that a very envious person is insatiable, he will never be satisfied, because his envy comes from within, and there will always be an object of its application. M. Klein
Attacking a good object and corrupting its content just because it is good is a completely different dynamic from aggression directed at a frustrating object that gets in the way, or from being violent towards an opponent who has taken possession of a good object. M. Klein emphasized that the primary thing is an envious fantasy about the possession of a good object and damage to its content, and not a desire to take revenge on the persecutor.
One of the hallmarks of narcissism is the preoccupation with envy.
"Envy is an attack on object relations in order to maintain a sense of omnipotence and self-idealization."
(O. Kernberg).
Envy is an attack on a good object to maintain a sense of omnipotence and grandeur, which is extremely important for maintaining the integrity of the narcissistic personality structure (or narcissistic balance in other personality types).
Fight-oriented daffodils are determined to succeed at any cost. They really enjoy themselves and take pride in their warlike spirit. But it is important to understand that their fragile intrapsychic balance is maintained due to the constant destructive damage to the object. In this way, the narcissist is protected from the experience of failure and unbearable shame. In his life, success is a defense against frustration and rage.
The constant pressing need to win is almost always accompanied by a contemptuous attitude towards others, which prevents the formation of normal attachments.
Winning victories in the competitive struggle, the narcissist, as if by the way, can treat his own brother with some disdain, whom he envies since childhood, speak of his friends, and in general do some meanness.
No matter how much someone would like to present envy as a "resource" promising achievements / success / victory, and divide it into "white" and "black" - envy is a heavy feeling that destroys from the inside, eats the envious person and, if possible, the object of his envy …
To date, there have been clients in my practice who succumbed to temptation and tried to work with specialists who promised to transform envy into good. Of course, all the participants in this crafty enterprise suffered a fiasco.
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