Envy And Gratitude: Steal Someone Else's Happiness Or Create Your Own?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

For the past two months, only two topics have been spinning in my head: men and the ability to make gifts. I will write about men in the near future, when I put everything on the shelves, but about gifts, creativity and related - please

I will not describe in detail the idea that relationships with parents (especially with the mother) become the very foundation on which all further paths, choices and relationships are built: to oneself, to another, to the world as a whole. It's obvious. But I'll show you possible development options with a couple of examples. And there are only two of them. This will be a long text, so sit down more comfortably.

So that's it. Thinking about gifts, I thought that the coolest gifts, the most memorable ones, are always unexpected, emotionally intense and very warm. Such gifts can only be made by a person who already has this warmth inside. And also creativity and spontaneity should live there, so that the surprise is a real surprise, and not just another sluggish bundle.

As an example, I thought about moms. There is a special kind of mothers who always manage to create the feeling of a true holiday. With balls that you see first when you open your eyes. With holiday posters that are hung after the child is sound asleep. With gifts that are always meticulously chosen, carefully wrapped or hidden, creating a whole treasure hunt. This whole holiday is created in order not only to see the intended joy in the eyes of the child, but to create a real and genuine - delight.

So that's it. In order to give something in this way, you need to firmly know that you will not lose anything. It's about warmth, which is just inside and is not in short supply. I would compare it to the Sun or another star, although this is not an entirely accurate comparison. It shines without demanding or expecting something in return. It just is. Without conditions and ultimatums.

And this ability to give warmth stretches from childhood. When the trees seem large, and a ladybug on her knee is a miracle. And you can relate to the world either conditionally this way, or in a diametrically opposite way. That is, the world is either good or bad at its core. It's like two different foundations on which the rest is built.

The magic Klein believed that there are two poles: envy and gratitude, both - not quite in the key to which we are accustomed in everyday life, and refer to the period of infancy and absolute helplessness. On a more understandable, but not entirely accurate example, it will look like this: you were hungry and your mother fed you. Option one: you are well-fed and happy and run away to play war games on the street. Option two: you get up from the table dissatisfied, because your mother did not guess that instead of rice you needed buckwheat.

So, being grateful is the basis of your own goodness. When you yourself can be so - good, then and only then can others and the world as a whole be so good. Then there is room for creativity, love, trust and other joys in life. Perhaps I will come back to this in one of the following texts. But now here's an example of the envy that Klein talked about.

Imagine a couple like this. He is the soul of the company and a lively guy who is not afraid to defend his own opinion and adores his childhood friends. He jogs in the morning, loves to travel and has loud music. She is languid and mysterious, with a clear hint of a deeply vulnerable nature, which she hides under frequent gloomy silence, love of poetry and almost romantic total fatalism. He does not believe in friendship, because people all lie. How and why they met and stayed together - let's leave behind the scenes. But now they have been together for seven years and the picture has changed. He stopped smiling and no longer believes in his capabilities, rarely laughs and no longer defends his rights. He is engaged in a continuous routine as a warehouse director and hardly sees his friends. She is in constant discontent with his gloom and indecision, calls the relationship meaningless, almost openly speaking about his insignificance.

Envy in this vein is unconscious, unconscious, but so violent and all-consuming. And it’s not at all about “damn it, Vasya has a job, but I don’t, you need more effort.” It's not even about just taking what you don't have. It is about trampling on, destroying it in the bud, wreaking havoc on a place of abundance. Because creating something of your own is simply morally impossible. Such a creative and spiritual sterility.

Anyone who is filled with envy will always be destructive in nature, no matter how rationally beautiful phrases he calls it. A person with a foundation of envy will always play the same scenario of loss and defeat. Because to be ready to win is to be ready for loss and defeat. And even more: it means at some point to already experience and realize the loss. Without this, all life will be a struggle with windmills, an attempt to destroy the "happiness" of the other.

Summarizing. If you just look around, then such a basically envious person is quite distinguishable, because he is not able to create and create his own. Envy and creativity always go hand in hand, but they never hold hands. To constantly create a rainbow, you need to have your own colors inside

Inspiration for you:)