About Female Impairment

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

In the male world, everything is simple. If you are successful in a social sense, if you earn money, achieve success in the professional field, if your fellow tribesmen respect and listen to you, then you can say you did it (you did it).

In the male world, everything is simpler and more visible.

I'm not saying that men's goals are easier to achieve. Not at all. It is sometimes difficult for a man to cope with the overwhelming burden of responsibility to himself, his family, team and society. But what a man is striving for is very clear. Realize professionally, be recognized by fellow tribesmen, provide for yourself and your family (preferably for several generations ahead - a joke) (although no, not a joke) and, accordingly, continue your family.

Women's tasks, in principle, are reduced mainly to the family. That notorious "family hearth", whatever one may say, is provided by a woman. It is she who creates relationships, supports her husband, listens to the pains and joys of the family, organizes family leisure, deals with schools, kindergartens and other family matters. Of course, a man can also take a direct part in this, but strategically and organizationally, a woman rules. It is she who ensures the family way of life when he stabs the next mammoth. He does this precisely because he has where to carry this mammoth.

The woman, on the other hand, creates meanings.

This article is not at all an ode to women, it is just a reminder of the incredibly important role women play in relationships. After all, imagine a man who knocked down a mammoth, who received the recognition of his fellow tribesmen, who boasted enough suddenly discovers that this mammoth is of no use to anyone else. Rather, it is needed, for example, by another man who will drag him into the family and cut him into pieces and enjoy the fact that he has made someone happy.

This is what a man needs. To know that he is needed, important, they are waiting for him, they are happy and upset with him, they make plans for life with him and enjoy today.

Somewhere I heard the phrase:

"People get married because they need a person nearby to be a witness of their life."

So, a woman gives a man exactly this, in general, like a man to a woman.

But why is she so unhappy and devalues her importance?

It often happens that a woman thinks that if she does not make money, then she is nobody. Where does this statement come from?

Well, to begin with, in our world of consumption, money has really become a mega-important category. This is a social factor. Further.

It often happens that it is the man who devalues the woman. Because of his inner complexes (and this is a long conversation), he can project onto a woman his unacceptable part - "unwanted whipping boy", and replay the battles that unfold in his head in real time. Fights can be both psychological and physical. It all depends on the depth of the experience of one's own inferiority. By devaluing a woman, a man automatically devalues himself, his choice, his relationship and their life together.

By such actions, he digs a hole for himself, because the female energy that could be directed at him, in a common cause, will be directed either to protect himself or to destroy relationships.

This is if a woman is devalued by her husband.

But it often happens that a woman devalues herself. Of course, the roots of low self-esteem, of course, in childhood. Nobody surpassed Freud's grandfather here.

If the girl was little praised, did not give compliments, encouraged and developed only mental abilities, since it is they who will allow her to feed herself in this world, then, of course, she will feel that she is not up to some level. And, if she also received the long-awaited praise only in the context of some achievements, then the whole thing is rubbish, this is the origins of perfectionism. She will constantly strive to take another height so that the parent figure (and then in life the image of the parent figure can be transferred to the boss, to society) finally praises her.

Indeed, all we need is love and acceptance. We always strive to get it and will fulfill any conditions, consciously or without, like a child who is ready to adjust the gender of any parent's request, so that he only softens, smiles and strokes his head, that is, accepts.

So, if masculine qualities were cultivated in a woman from the very virginity, and feminine qualities were ignored, then it is obvious that the small woman did not develop inside or developed as she could. In confusion, in shame, in secret.

Many of us hid the birth of a woman from our parents, many were deprived of tactility, intimate conversations about intimacy.

And this is not always because the parents were bad. “Bad - good” are not psychological categories at all. They simply didn’t know how, they didn’t know, they couldn’t, there was no time.

During that period, many things were banned, there were other priorities and values. That time is the time of a public person, where collective opinion is the law in everything, where there is no place for veal tenderness, where there are clear rules and regulations, where the pioneer meeting shames you in front of everyone for pranks, where exactly society decides for you what to do, how to be with whom to live.

I don’t mean to say that the time was wrong. Again - I repeat, I try not to use these words as much as possible.

I just want to indicate that today is a different time - the time of disclosing one's own individuality, the time of true acquaintance with oneself in the present, defining one's own needs and priorities.

The public opinion has lost its credibility, as it did not justify the trust.

Therefore, now is the time for frankness and truth, at least with oneself.

And a woman who grew up at a time when the development of her feminine essence was not properly supported now has to catch up. Hence there are so many female practices, Vedic centers, spiritual schools.

It is very difficult to find your own value from the outside, especially when there is no place for it inside, but this place needs to be created with painstaking work, removing day after day your soul and consciousness from wrong attitudes, changing views, creating your home in a new way.

The first time will have to be difficult, it's like learning a foreign language - you seem to know a bunch of words, and you know the rules, and you also know people who have learned, but you can't speak.

This is an incredible state of helplessness. I would like to drop everything and slide into self-flagellation. It was like that for me too. But if you don’t quit, then the day will come when you will speak.

So it is with women's self-esteem. She can only be born in the soul of a woman. If she is not inside, no external confirmation will be available to her. She simply will not be able to see and hear anything.

It's like a new device on a computer that cannot be read, because you need to download an additional program. And only when the computer installs an additional program, then playback will be possible.

Therefore, self-esteem is born inside through the awareness of one's own place, one's own value, one's own significance in this world. It's always about the ability to enjoy yourself and the world in which you live. It's always about developing your own personality and finding your life's work.

For a woman, the most important question is not "what to do?", But "how?" Rather, she should ask herself the question: "How do I want to feel?", "What do I want to be?" And, from the answer to this question, an image will already follow of what she needs to do to be what she wants.