2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Each person in his life finds himself at the crossroads of "I must" and "I want". Remember which path you chose? In fact, we make this choice every day. Each has a unique potential given at birth, but it depends only on us whether we will develop it or not. The artist, designer and writer El Luna, in his book Between Need and Want (MYTH Publishing House), shares advice on how to find your destiny
It is necessary - these are the opinions of others about how we should live. These are all the expectations that others place on us. Sometimes these "shoulds" are small and seemingly harmless, easy to satisfy. “You should go to this party,” for example. In other cases, "shoulds" are highly influential systems of thought that put pressure on us and, in their most destructive form, force us to live life differently. By accepting "must", we choose life for someone or something other than ourselves.
"I want" is different. "I want" is who we really are, what we believe in and what we do alone with ourselves in the present. This is what calls from the depths of the soul. These are our convictions, passions, deeply hidden urges and desires - inevitable, undeniable and inexplicable. Unlike "I must", "I want" does not agree to compromises. "I want" appears when we cease to correspond to other people's ideals and go towards our own - and this allows us to reveal our potential. "I want" is the best choice we can make in life.
Here are 10 ways to help you find your purpose.
1. Realize what is stealing your freedom
If you want to live a full life, if you want to be free, you must first of all understand why you are not free, what prevents you from being free. The natural process of socialization requires that a person succumb to the influence of various "you need", thus functioning as a part of society. However, growing up, it is useful to be aware of those "needs" that you inherited genetically or through upbringing. Some shoulds can be appreciated and preserved, while others are worth giving up. "Must" leads to "I want". You create your prison and you yourself can free yourself.
2. Try the empty chair technique
The empty chair technique was developed in the 1940s as part of Gestalt therapy. All you need is two chairs and 15 minutes. Sit in one of the chairs. It's important to do this technique live. If you do this exercise only in your head, you will not be able to enjoy all the positive effects. The main purpose of the exercise is to talk to yourself. You can use this technique for any topic, but in this case, the "must" and "want" settings will talk to each other. First, voice everything that you "need". Move to a different chair. Answer your own questions. Protect yourself, get angry, shout; whatever you feel - express it. When you finish the monologue, change your seat and continue the conversation on behalf of "I want." You will know when to stop.
3. Remember how you were as a child
Destination never manifests itself more strongly than in childhood. What were you like as a child? What did you like to do? Were you a loner or did you prefer company? Were you independent or chose collaboration? Were you an organizer or a dreamer? If you don't remember, call your mom or someone who knew you well in early childhood. Ask about who you were. As you speak, take notes and keep them: there are the earliest seeds of your future destiny.
4. List everything you enjoy doing now
The answer to the question "What are you doing just because you like it?" Will help you get closer to your destination. Write as many answers as you can.
5. Remember what you do when you procrastinate?
This will also clarify what your purpose is.
6. Encounter breathtaking fantasies
If everything was possible, what would you do, who would you be?
7. Write two obituaries
Write two versions of your obituary on separate sheets of paper. Don't worry about being practical. Imagine how your life will develop if you continue along the path you have already chosen. Then think about what will end up in your obituary if you heed your inner call.
8. Admit it, why do you have butterflies in your stomach?
Take time and remember everything that gives you pleasure. Use all senses: the sights, smells, sounds or sensations that make butterflies rustle in your belly.
9. Get a new skill every month
Learn to swim on your back, sign up for an acroyoga, explore Van Gogh's childhood. At first, these activities may seem unrelated to each other, but over time, your interests will mix and mutually enrich, because they have one common element - you. As designer Charles Ames liked to say, in the end everything connects. And so it will be.
10. Follow the "I want" path every day
Everyone has a set of obligations and time constraints - real and imagined. The most effective way to find your destination is to find ten minutes. While escaping all your commitments to fully immerse yourself in a destiny for many months sounds romantic, the harder and safer path is to make minor changes to reality every day. It is a process of inclusion, not destruction. Ten minutes can be found everywhere:
Ten minutes while the kettle is boiling - go ahead!
Ten minutes while the machine is drying clothes - go!
Ten minutes of commercials during a half-hour TV show - go ahead!
Ten minutes in a traffic jam - go ahead!
Time that was limitation becomes a gift.
Choosing "want", you must act. You have to do something.
Based on the book MYTH "Between I must and I want".
Recommended:
When You Do Not Fulfill Your Purpose, You Are Committing A Crime Against The Universe
Imagine an apple. An ordinary, big, beautiful, tasty apple. Have you presented? Now tell me: what is the main function (purpose) of an apple? Probably to please someone with your great taste. Of course, you can draw a still life from an apple, and use it in a children's craft and use it instead of a ball.
How To Find Your Purpose Or What To Spend Your Life Time On?
How to find your purpose, what to do in life? How to make it so that the business in which you invest your time, strength and energy brings satisfaction, reveals and improves abilities, skills and talents, qualitatively improves life. What do you need to do to feel happy and fulfilled in life?
How To Find Your Purpose In Life. The Real Story Of Alena
Usually Alena went to work when the dawn was just shyly gray on the horizon. At first, Alena did not think at all about how to find her purpose in life. A prosperous lady, a nice car, an iPhone of the latest model in her purse … The company where Alena worked was stable and predictable, like the Sun revolving around the Earth.
Finding A Purpose In Life: The Sure Way
The life stories of people who have remained in the memory of generations, or at least in the memory of a kind, differ from the life of everyone else in that these people left something behind. They left a trace. This means that their souls have provided themselves with a reliable channel of energy supply from the descendants who remember them.
How Not To Lose Yourself In The Stream Of Life: Purpose, Meaning, Purpose
Is it important to set goals? In the Universe, action is primary. Those who have carefully observed the behavior of children will immediately understand me. I have three children, and raising them, I see perfectly well that for them activity is more important than a goal.
