Empathy Or Listening With Your Heart

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Even as adults, we always hope that fate will give us a person who will understand us perfectly. The kind of person who will share with us our joys and sorrows as his own. This wonderful feeling that allows you to emotionally feel in your interlocutor is called Empathy.

Someone else's emotions - like your own

The ability to consciously empathize with other people's emotions, unfortunately, is very rare today. The term "Empathy" in psychology was one of the first to be mentioned in the works of Sigmund Freud, who argued that the psychoanalyst, in order to carry out effective work with a patient, must take into account his emotional state. The psychoanalyst enters this state, after which he gains the ability to understand it by comparing it with his own feelings.

Empathy today means a lot. First of all, empathy is a conscious empathy for a person, his emotional state, without losing the feeling of external control over such a state. In medicine and psychology, empathy is often equated with empathic listening - demonstrating that the specialist correctly understands the patient's emotional state. In forensic science, having the skill of empathic listening refers to the ability to gather information about an object's feelings and thoughts. For psychics, empathy is considered a special feeling, accessible only to some people. The value of this ability in extrasensory perception is great: it serves as a tool for perceiving the emotional states of other people "directly", as well as broadcasting their emotions, while the absence of direct contact with a person is not a hindrance.

This feeling is equated with the concept of emotional telepathy. The manifestations of empathy are very different: from complete immersion in the feelings of a communication partner (emotional or affective empathy), to an objective understanding of the experiences of a communication partner without strong emotional involvement. In this case, the following types of empathy are distinguished:

empathy - emotional responsiveness, the need to provide help; empathy - a person experiences the same emotions as a communication partner; sympathy is a very friendly and warm attitude towards a person. Empathy is not associated with the perception of any specific emotion (as with compassion). This feeling is used to refer to empathy for any state. There are many professions in which empathic listening is not only desirable, but even necessary.

Such professions include almost all professions focused on communication with people: psychologists, psychotherapists; doctors; teachers; HR managers; leaders; detectives; officials; sellers; hairdressers and others. As you can see, the application of this amazing property of our psyche can be found anywhere. People who have the ability to empathize are called empaths.

Can you become an empath?

You can often hear: "He is a born psychologist." Often such a phrase indicates a person's ability to emotionally empathize without special professional skills. Can you become an empath? Is empathy an innate or acquired ability? What are its signs? According to biology, brain activity, reflecting the actions and state of other individuals, directly depends on the activity of mirror neurons. Biologists suggest that the strength of empathy depends on their activity.

An indirect confirmation of this is that people suffering from alexithymia do not have the ability to empathize, since their neurophysiological problems do not allow them to distinguish even their emotions. Modern experts believe that empathy is an innate and genetic property, but life experience enhances or weakens it. The strength of empathy depends on the presence of a rich life experience, accuracy of perception, and developed skills in empathic communication. Initially, women, especially those who have children, have a more developed ability for empathy.

Provided that at least the rudiments of empathy are innate, its development can be accelerated by various training methods and special exercises that develop the skills of effective use of this ability in professional and personal communication. If you want to learn to understand the emotions and feelings of others, it is useful to practice such artistic studies, such as "Memorizing faces", "How others see me", "Reincarnation". They also develop well the ability to empathize and sympathize with any fortune-telling, the game "Association". The development of empathy is facilitated by the general development of emotionality through dance, watching movies, listening to music, and other methods of art therapy. There are various methods and techniques to identify the level of empathy ability in people, as well as certain aspects of this ability. The most reliable diagnosis aimed at determining the level of empathy is called "Empathy Quotient"; for Russian-speaking users there is its adaptation called "The level of empathy". Pros and cons

Empathy is a real gift that not everyone knows how to use for its intended purpose. Often this property of the psyche brings suffering to a person, because not always people experience only joy, happiness, love and other positive states. What for one person seems to be the ultimate dream, for another is a heavy burden. The ability to empathize and sympathize presupposes that a person has a developed personality, since an immature mind is unable to cope with a flurry of other people's emotions. Having decided to develop empathy, it is not at all superfluous to evaluate the pros and cons of such a solution.

Pros Cons Inexhaustible opportunities for the development of imagination. A person is not capable of healthy aggression and competition. Effective help in many professions. Increased sensitivity, as a result of which - emotional burnout. This state produces many original solutions. An easy onset of anxiety and fear, a high percentage of mental illness. The ability to help other people, give them support and acceptance. There is a high likelihood of a “one-sided game” relationship, when a person only gives without receiving anything in return.

Develop or get rid of?

Each person must decide for himself what level of empathy he needs for a comfortable life. There are 4 types of empaths in total: Non-empaths: completely closed the channels of empathy (deliberately or under the influence of trauma). These people cannot recognize non-verbal and verbal signals. Ordinary empaths: they are constantly in a state of stress and emotional overload, acutely experiencing other people's problems. They often suffer from headaches. The ability to empathize is not controlled by them. Conscious empaths: manage their ability to empathize, easily adapt to other people's emotions, knowing how not to let them pass through themselves. Professional Empaths: They have great control over their ability, often using it for professional purposes. They can control any other people's emotions, change a person's mood, relieve mental and physical pain.

If fate has endowed you with a developed ability for empathy, maybe it is still worth developing it? At least in order to fulfill your destiny - to help other people. However, a strong capacity for compassion and empathy often comes at a price. Empaths quite often enter into asymmetric relationships without receiving sufficient support from their partner. Such people feel uncomfortable in conflict, are not inclined to compete and defend their interests. They often suffer from depression as well as anxiety disorders. It is not easy for empaths to overcome fear, so panic attacks are possible. The ability to feel someone else's pain leads to what psychologists call empathic stress. For effective work with people, having a developed empathy is a real find. But empaths often have problems with personal relationships. They are so sensitive that it is impossible to hide anything from them, and any negative emotions of the partner literally “hit on the head”. Therefore, the empath's partner must necessarily be a kind, loyal and non-conflict person.

What advice do you have for an empath?

First of all, you need to learn to manage yourself. Be able to close energetically or learn to filter perceived emotions. It is important to clearly program what energy can be passed through and what not. In addition, the empath must find a safe way to dump other people's negative emotions. You can learn to replace empathy with non-empathic empathy - a more restrained expression of kindness, love, and concern. Take a more detached position, and you will see that feeling a person does not mean hurting him. It is better for empaths to immediately realize that you cannot save the whole world, you cannot warm everyone. But you can always share emotions with your loved ones.