What Has 2020 Taught Us?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2024-01-18 02:26

How was 2020 for most of us? What were the pluses and minuses? How can we analyze all this in order to use this experience for good and make our life even better in the future?

Undoubtedly, 2020 was a year of changes and crises. Someone lost their job, someone, unfortunately, lost loved ones, someone - self-identity. In what sense? What a person imagined about himself did not justify itself in the new conditions. Many of us have changed values, the meaning of life, that is, deep existential things have happened to you.

Remember - quarantine was not the reason why everything went down the drain for you. The quarantine only highlighted places with no obvious soil underfoot. In fact, you were not completely sure of yourself before. If the relationship fell apart, it means that before that there were problems with them. If you had to change jobs, it means that before that you suspected that something was wrong with the job. Another option is that you denied, displaced reality and your inner truth, unwillingness, for example, to do the work in which you were involved, and quarantine pushed you to this, revealing long-standing problems.

So, let's talk about average people like you and me. Those of us who thought about our future at least a little in advance, put aside the "financial cushion", took care of our health, including psychological, got out of the crisis much easier. In fact, we have not yet emerged from the crisis and do not know how long we will live in this state. However, there is an undeniable fact on the face - absolutely all of us are faced with anxiety of uncertainty. From personal experience I can say that this year there were many clients, in the work with whom the questions of anxiety, fear of uncertainty, control were raised in one way or another (“I am losing control over this situation, and this provoked even more turning into myself”).

What can I rely on within myself? This is the most important result and indicator of 2020. We all overestimated our values and ourselves, tried to turn deeper to ourselves ("What do I really want? Who am I really? What do I love? What is my true work, realization? In what area do I want to be realized?" This year has shown us that we need to take into account the realities and move towards maximum independence. In our time, the desire to rely on the state (the metaphor of a parent) goes into the background. We all understand perfectly well that a parent will no longer save us! We take responsibility ourselves, look for ways to self-realization, determine in which area to develop and grow, where to earn and find stability in life. And we either independently achieve the desired goals, or do not move anywhere, or remain at a "broken trough" if we rely solely on the state. Alas, our state (like the CIS countries) is not able to provide us with support. However, people in Europe are now faced with similar problems, so you can only rely on support within yourself. The most reliable investment this year is investing in yourself, no one will take it away from you, no crisis will swallow it up. You can process the information received, develop and implement your experience, knowledge and skills. Accordingly, those who could and had time to do this, they reaped the fruits of their labors more than those who did not think about the future.

Modern technologies force us to reconsider the areas in which we need to direct our efforts. Various offline events fade into the background, and people who resisted before living on the Internet (advertising and the provision of their services, publicity) have come to the conclusion that one should not neglect the innovations that society offers us. Basically, social networks are 10-15-20 years old, but many of us have ignored them.

Moreover, the views on professional activity are now being reassessed - we want to choose one profession that could bring more money, guarantee stability, and calm down once and for all. For example, doctors have always been, are and will be; lawyers or economists. However, times are changing, competition is growing, and we need to reevaluate the relevance of our profession every 10 years. It is worth thinking about the future at least sometimes - not to fall into a state of anxiety, not to create a neurosis for yourself, but to think and reflect on what will happen in the future if you relax now. Our body wants to relax and strives for it (“I have found and will use it stably for many years, preferably until the end of my life!”). That is why all changes require a lot of energy involvement, great strength, and the older you get, the more difficult it is to change. If you accustom yourself to move towards changes, follow them, implement something in your life (even if these are very small steps, you do not need to make drastic decisions right away, go through drastic changes), then you are at 50 and at 70, and at 80 it will be more or less easier to make and adapt to change.

What else have many people faced this year?

Quarantine caught some with the wrong person. They ended up in an apartment / house with the same partner. Previously, everyone was constantly at work and simply did not have time to notice each other, but now I had to face the truth.

Do not think that this situation has developed solely due to quarantine - sooner or later it would have happened. In the current circumstances, it seems to have pushed you. Be sure to tell yourself, no matter how painful it may be: "Now I have time to go through everything, and there is life ahead to find my man!" Remember - no matter how old you are, if you are alive, then there is still every chance. Yes, on the one hand it is unpleasant, but on the other hand, you have the opportunity to live the life that you really want to have, and it is with the person you want to see next to you (with the same values, with some similar interests and etc.).

1. Another part of the people found themselves alone during the quarantine period. Previously, when they lived a full social life, went to work, talked with colleagues and friends, it was possible to deny some feeling of loneliness, force it out, hide it under the rug, but now they had to face an unpleasant feeling one-on-one and admit - “Yes, I need a person next to me! More adequate profiles have appeared on dating sites, and you should not be ashamed - try to find a match for yourself, this is a really important and necessary need. If it hurts and hurts you, it is better to understand (if it is very difficult for you, consult a therapist).
2. Quarantine strips away our masks - and here we are talking not only about ourselves, but also about our environment. How have others helped you cope with difficult emotions, financial turmoil, or even the loss of loved ones? During this period, you could more clearly and clearly notice who your loved one is by spirit, and who can be related only by blood. Perhaps the one you thought was a friend did not show himself so in quarantine. However, there is no need to hang labels and “put an end” on a person - it could be much more difficult for him than for you, because none of us knows who and how life situations are living. Someone is sensitive to any little thing, and someone easily copes with difficult problems - and we cannot compare it, each of us is difficult in our body. Maybe over time you will still be able to connect with your friends and your surroundings, even if now you are deeply disappointed.

Quarantine, like any other crisis, highlights what has long needed to be changed. But like any other crisis, this allows us to change inside, to be reborn like a phoenix, to become better, to effectively use the experience and wisdom gained in our future life.

Believe in the best, work on yourself, turn to therapy - so you can get out of the crisis much easier and more calmly, with a minimum of losses. At the same time, do not be afraid to change jobs, part with a partner, find new relationships. Your psyche will gradually move towards better changes, but do not immediately expect huge results.

Many did not "fall" into the crisis due to the fact that they worked on themselves, so invest first of all in yourself and further, you will have a feeling of stability no matter what is happening around!