2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
There are two different universes in the world - a man and a woman.
In these universes, they communicate in different languages, live by their own rules and orders, look at the same situation from different angles, create relationships with different expectations and approaches. And they get out of these relations in different ways, if they do not add up.
What is the difference between these universes?
The image of a beloved or loved one is formed at the initial stage of a relationship. And it's no secret that we try to please our chosen one. When we are in a state of love, then there is an unconscious desire to please our partner. And we put on the appropriate masks. Homebody, to please the desires of a beloved man, go to a restaurant and to discos. And fidgets spend quiet evenings watching TV.
This is where the main misconception arises. When we try to please, we become insincere in our desires and actions. And the more a man or woman suppresses their vision of the relationship, their desires and needs, the stronger the disappointment can be. The more the bitterness from broken illusions.
The stage of falling in love passes and the realities of family and everyday life allow both partners to psychologically relax. They take off their masks and rose-colored glasses. And then all our real feelings, fears, emotions, beliefs, scenarios begin to manifest. Then the first conflicts and misunderstandings appear. These are the initial bells for thinking about the reasons, the essence and possible consequences of these, as yet insignificant, disagreements.
But a woman would not be a woman if she did not believe that a man can be changed. That it can be "adjusted" to the appropriate parameters. Initially, she invests energy and other resources to interest this man. She unconsciously adjusts to his habits and desires. And after such a titanic work, she has a desire to change him. But this is a trap. And a huge number of women get into it.
The man unconsciously wants the woman to always remain the same as he met her on the first date. It is difficult for him to accept a new image of a woman, different from the one with which he fell in love. And the more a woman changes (externally, emotionally, materially), the more difficult it is for a man to cope with it. This is how they are arranged.
And here it is important to realize the key idea - we are different! We learn in relationships to accept another person with his values, with his way of thinking, with his negative or positive experiences. The more there is a desire to accept, cognize and explore your partner, the less conflict situations there will be. And if you also involve your man in this wonderful world of knowing and discovering each other from new sides, then your life together will be filled with new colors and emotions.
Relationships are a journey inward
The partner is our mirror. It reflects our inner world to us.
Our man returns to us what he feels, being next to us. And thus reflects what we feel.
Olga Salodkaya
Female trainer, coach, psychologist
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