2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Any animal is periodically unhappy if their basic needs are at stake. For a person, anger is one of the basic experiences. And although we are all angry, this behavior is usually condemned: unlike joy, this emotion is considered "negative" and "unpleasant", and many would like to, in principle, never experience it. Let's figure out why you shouldn't do this.
First Anger is a defensive-defensive reaction.
Why is it good to be in touch with your anger? The fact that you are not aware of anger does not mean that you are not angry. Quite the contrary: because you are not aware of your feelings, you lose the ability to control how they manifest. And also people who do not feel their anger, understand themselves worse, their needs. To understand what we like, we need to be able to distinguish between what we don't like at all. Any online controversy is a great platform to see how people struggle with poorly understood aggression. In this case, many people have a question: is it possible to express anger ethically? Yes it is possible. The first step towards green and civilized expression of anger is to allow yourself to be angry. Allowing yourself to feel any feelings is a huge step, and it's important to understand what triggered your anger. The subject of aggression is often displaced, and you will have to ask yourself the question many times, “What makes me angry? What and with whom am I really angry?”To find the final answer. Anger is most often personal remember this.
What to do next? But then, rather, we do not work with anger, but with a violation of boundaries, a threat or discomfort, which generate anger as a defensive reaction.
A good option is to tell the addressee about your anger or that some behavior is unacceptable using "I-messages" (that is, talking about your own feelings and wishes). In a situation where it is unsafe to voice anger, it is better to try to leave the problem area, whether it be a party with unpleasant people or a company where employees are mistreated.
In any case, remember that the idea that anger is a "bad" emotion that you need to get rid of as soon as possible is hopelessly outdated. Listen to yourself and your feelings - perhaps anger will be the impetus that will help you understand what situations in your life are worth paying attention to and where changes are needed.
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