NARCISSIC EXPANSION OR VALLEY OF NARCISSES. PART 2

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

It is worth recognizing that the psychological community, unfortunately, also throws the seeds of narcissism. The cult of self-development is so tightly hammered into the heads of modern people that there is practically no criticism left. Self-development is equated with success and a prosperous life, which is highly doubtful; there are many variables that will challenge this equation.

The cult of self-development strongly recommends living "here and now," and also exclusively for yourself. What exactly is the mechanism of self-development, the starting point of which is this notorious "here and now", what is so bad, within reason, the analysis of past deeds, thoughts, experience, etc., how does it harm self-development so much? The nature of all experiences is such that they implicitly include past experiences, and talk about the need to “be here and now” ignores how time relates to experience.

Thinking in terms of "we" is a terrible bad manners that must be overcome. Only the affirmation of one's own “I” as the only stronghold and point of support, hence the slogans: “You are the master of your own destiny!”, With tales that “everything is in your hands” and everything in your life depends on you. Of course, a fulcrum in ourselves helps us not to feel helpless and powerless, to carry out plans and intentions without turning to external forces. But reinforced concrete internality leads to the fact that a person considers himself to be absolutely responsible for everything that happens to him and around. It is also one of the signs of a narcissistic ulcer, which often develops into depressive and anxiety disorders. There are also various accidents, force majeure, to which the power of a person does not apply.

Time management is persistent in the fight against procrastination, it is necessary to be always busy, helpful and efficient. Do we all need it? The one who really needs it, and it is understandable, is the top managers of large corporations who want the employee to be extremely effective every second of the time. Idleness is part of human nature that we need to get our thoughts in order and recharge our batteries.

The spread slogan of positive psychology “Believe in a dream” is a fairy tale with a touch of romance, fortunately, if it is useless, or even downright harmful. How not to repeat this mantra, but often in order to feel good, you need to self-actualize and achieve visible results. Otherwise, the balloon inflated with illusions will burst.

Any goal can be achieved, as soon as we visualize it, create a collage, send a request to space or affirm, - the same positive psychology promotes. The concept of "Material Thoughts" is most directly related to narcissism as a phenomenon associated with the termination of psychological maturation and getting stuck at a stage of development corresponding to 2 years of a person's life.

Farewell to the illusions of one's own omnipotence, which occurs in the process of denarcissization, allows one to distinguish between the world of reality and the world of fantasy, and also clearly realize the limit of one's own capabilities. The paradigm of "castration", which reveals to the child his inadequacy, establishes a connection with reality, with which it is necessary to get used to as he encounters the limitations of his own strength. Failure to recognize the fact that one's own capabilities are limited is one of the eloquent signs of narcissism. Magical thinking is normal for a certain age, but believing that you can make yourself successful by the power of your thoughts lying on the couch is a dead-end path. Mature forms of narcissism (transformation of narcissism) allow a person to be aware of the limitations of their existence and to act adequately in accordance with this discovery. In a healthy version, having reached maturity, a person is able to set realistic goals for himself, focusing on his abilities and strengths.

"Never give up!" Is the next trendy slogan. Never? Of course, "Perseverance and work will grind everything," but you can grind yourself, then the result is unlikely to please.

And the last one, on the topic of the seeds sown by psychologists, is a very slippery question, slippery from the fact that it is easy to slip on it and be misunderstood. We are talking about personal growth trainings, which have become almost everyday. I myself actively urge people to self-exploration and development, and it happens that this "HAPPENS", and this makes life, of course, better for everyone. But. In fact, our entire life path is growth, which has its own rates, stations and trajectory of movement, all this is both universal and individual at the same time. The narcissistic call tells absolutely everyone to twist themselves into an asana today. I saw many who took the "lotus position", albeit sitting in a classical psychotherapeutic circle, in which, apart from the very "pose" imposed by the culture of narcissism, there was nothing but an image of themselves looking for their purpose and leading a truly correct lifestyle … Those who seek to understand nothing about their soul gush with false insights and chimeric ideas of growth; others, succumbing to suggestion, dance with them the happy dance of false catharsis; some unfortunate people are only bashfully perplexed by their own inner uncomplicatedness (for the latter it is insulting).

Myths are not accidental, they are based on a psychological reality that is understandable for many generations. Hence the appeal to the mythological image of Narcissus as a convenient model that unfolds the universality of narcissistic problems.

Most of those striving for self-development, growth, enlightenment, participating in all kinds of trainings, reproduce an episode from a myth when a self-cognizing Narcissus, bending over his own reflection, admires "on", remaining in captivity of the external, enchanted by his beauty, he dies of love for illusion something that doesn't really exist. Narcissism does not give you the opportunity to realize the essence of your "I", reflected in the water, and therefore does not give a chance to realize your own soul. There is no growth. Only reflections on the surface of the water, hazy thoughts and a sentimental utopia of growth. So, a considerable number of those who have embarked on the path of growth during group meetings assure of special insights and incredible transformations. Some, going beyond the circle, suddenly turn into the same absolutely prosaic, unenlightened and unrefined. Others continue their attempts at growth, engaging in tedious conversations, the construction of which is a labyrinth of artfully intertwined concepts and expressions that have nothing to do with real growth.

The situation is worsened by the fact that psychologists, like all people, are also susceptible to the influence of narcissism, and such a fragmentation of the goals and objectives of the development of oneself as a specialist, and of his clients, as individuals, gives rise to situations when a psychologist tries to justify his professional primitivism for himself (manifested in avoiding more complex professional tasks and the formation of a fragmented person, but not an integral personality) and, fragmenting his own personality, turns into a fragmented specialist. An important feature of such a fragmented personality is that it is deprived of the main idea (meaning, value) of life. If a person does not have a leading value, he can be “bought with giblets” - in parts. All this gives rise to the most horrible destruction - the destruction of sophisticated self-deception. In other words, an inverted order is maintained, the opposite of that which L. Tolstoy spoke about, where the main thing is construction, war, trade. And no rapidly growing army of psychologists will save as long as it serves a morally upside-down world.