2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Many people have a firm conviction - why do I need a psychologist if I can heal myself (now there is enough information on the Internet, and the videos on YouTube are quite understandable). But why doesn't the “self-help” strategy help?
All psychologists on the YouTube channel provide information in chunks. It is impossible to read the entire book of Nancy McWilliams in one short video, to convey all the knowledge that a psychologist possesses. If the video talks about a point situation, the therapist sees it from one point of view, but it is enough to change at least one constituent factor (for example, another person was just standing nearby), and in fact this is a different situation!
Accordingly, you cannot get the entire knowledge base from YouTube. Do you want to know some useful information on psychology? Read professional books written specifically for psychologists and psychotherapists. However, it is difficult to apply the information received to yourself even in this case. Your personal therapy and theory are completely different things (theory can be understood through several sessions of therapy, but it is rather difficult to see yourself in a specific role and disassemble all the components). From the point of view of practice, a deeper study of the problem is needed, and not an introspection of some piece of personal therapy, when you were taught to find the ligaments and "try" them on to yourself.
It is not information that heals the psyche, but direct contact. By watching a video, you are in contact with the speaker. And the way this person speaks, what unconscious processes make him utter certain phrases, this is what heals! However, through books and videos, part of the contact is still lost (conditionally - you get only 5% of the contact, together 100%, which you could get with a personal consultation).
Sometimes there are situations when people come with very deep problems and difficulties and, having received from a psychologist the information that they need, and a positive message ("It's okay! It can be cured, it is enough to do this and that"), after one session radically change their lives.
An example from practice - a couple turned for advice (first a woman came, then a man), after one session people were able to resolve their issues and returned only after 3 years and then to share the result (there were fewer quarrels in the family, the atmosphere is comfortable, calm and stable). If we consider an example from the point of view of psychology, Z. Freud explained that we all communicate at the same level (physical), but there is also an unconscious level (and as long as we communicate with a person, our unconscious also exchanges information). Currently, this theory is explained by mirror neural connections, which are somehow transmitted in a personal message.
No one can cure deep mental problems on their own (conditionally - we will not fill a tooth on our own). If we want to have a haircut, then we do not do the haircut ourselves, but go to a specialist who will do everything professionally, correctly, efficiently and effectively. The same is true in psychotherapy.
In addition, in personal therapy, you get a new experience, and this moment is especially important for those people who have attachment trauma, codependency in character, and counterdependence. In the latter case, a person can only be helped in therapy, when, thanks to a long-term relationship with the therapist, he eventually realizes that it is not scary to open up to another, they will not necessarily be used in a relationship, etc. The masochistic and sadistic parts can also be corrected only in personal relationships that show that it is possible to live differently. An important nuance - it will be shown, not told! The deep unconscious part of our psyche does not believe words, and never will. A person needs to get his own, new experience in order to take it from a relationship with a psychologist and apply it to personal relationships (try and say: “It turns out that you could live differently, trust your partner, allow him to enter your territory, not be afraid to become codependent, counter-dependent etc. ). As a result, through their own efforts, their level of intimacy and distance is formed, and having received such experience in therapy, a person will not be so difficult in personal relationships. Undoubtedly, this does not always work out right away, for some people the process takes a long time (up to ten sessions), but in the end the client is involved in life in a different way. Another example is people with high levels of anxiety. Anxiety is often based on attachment trauma in the first year of life. And this is such an unconscious level that it is difficult to work with the head, the best option is personal therapy with a frequency of at least once a week (then a person will understand that they are waiting for him, they are interested in him, they will listen to him, help to survive all the painful sensations). All this creates a calmer backdrop.
You can study information for a long time, understand everything perfectly, retell each book, shine with knowledge of theory, understand what comes from where, but be unable to change something inside your consciousness. This situation will continue until your inner child feels that he is pitied, seen, noticed, respected no matter what and how he does, ready to accept at any moment. Of course, knowledge also plays an important role - thanks to therapy in combination with one's own development in the field of psychology, psychotherapy passes much faster. On average, after 2 years of psychotherapy, the client reaches a fairly good level, but it takes some more time to consolidate the result and put everything "on the shelves", so some go to therapy for more than two years (this period helps them to make sure of stability own life).
You should not live in destruction, suffering and pain, when you can heal everything and live in harmony with yourself! Paradise inside each of us, remember this!
Recommended:
Why Is Codependency Needed?
The answer to this question can be given in one sentence. Codependency is essential to relieve mental stress. Yes exactly. You can, of course, say that codependency itself causes tension, but our psyche follows the path of greater benefit. We can say that our psyche is only interested in satisfying our needs, and what will happen later to a much lesser extent.
Why Is Illness Needed
Disease is one of the ways to get what you cannot get without illness. Some psychotherapists believe that almost all diseases are fundamentally psychological. But classical medicine officially recognizes seven diseases in which the psychosomatic factor is the leading one.
Why Is Illness Needed?
Disease is a way to get what you cannot get without illness. Some psychotherapists believe that almost all diseases are fundamentally psychological. But classical medicine officially recognizes seven diseases in which the psychosomatic factor is the leading one.
Dominatrix Psychotherapist Or "all Kinds Of Mothers Are Needed"
Give our post-Soviet person mostly translation difficulties. And not as in the film of the same name, but so that it was incomprehensible to bloody snot. But at the same time, it is imperative that everything is clear and understandable, like the multiplication table by two.
Why Is Long-term Dynamic Therapy Needed?
What is long-term dynamic therapy and how does it differ from short term? Why in some cases it is necessary to use this particular type psychotherapy, and what happens to a person while using this approach? For some reason, short-term therapy often does not provide effective result?
