2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
This is how the spouses described their relationship at the consultation!
Family life has turned into the coexistence of two strangers under one roof: everyday life, empty talk about nothing, breakfast in the morning, in the evening she is on the phone, he is in a computer game. Romance has disappeared from the relationship, feelings have cooled, and attraction has faded, the spouses have moved away from each other. That's all. The couple became neighbors.
Someone will argue, many families have it, what else is needed? It can be much worse! And here he does not drink, does not beat, and does not even change. There is nothing more to be desired. Do you think so?
Can such a relationship be revived?
Difficulties occur between husband and wife at different stages. And the first thing to start with is to realize and acknowledge the fact of the problem and make a joint decision to establish contact. And if this is a mutual desire, then you can continue to work. And if only one of the spouses wants to improve relations, then it is unlikely that anything will come of it.
The couple did not want to put up with what they have and came to me for family therapy. And they did the right thing!
We began our work with the awareness and recognition of the difficulties that the couple had not been for the first year. This is a lack of romantic attention, fatigue and unspoken emotions and claims that have accumulated, frequent conflicts over money, irritation with the influence of the older generation on the family. We jointly discovered all these issues, discussed and found solutions. Through disappointment and resentment, anger and powerlessness, guilt, acceptance and forgiveness, there is a difficult path to restoring intimacy and trust. And the main thing is the desire to work on relationships.
Gradually, we worked with a couple of these questions. And gradually everything began to improve. Of course, the relationship is not ideal, but each of them tries, goes towards each other. And now I already want to return home.
I wrote this to you because it is important to understand what you want in a relationship and not live like everyone else, not tolerate and adapt, being content with little, but jointly build harmonious relationships.
Look for ways to express emotional closeness that are unique to your couple, talk about your feelings more often, show tenderness and care for each other. And then the years lived together will bring you closer together. After all, this is the basis for a happy family life.
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