2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Many years ago, back in my student years, I’m afraid, I don’t want to, and maybe somehow later, I went to the dentist with a bad tooth.
The need for professional help was obvious and did not leave any chances to somehow settle the issue on their own.
At the doctor's office, I immediately began to babble and make excuses. The dentist realized that the question of my anxiety is more of a psychological nature, and said a phrase that I remembered for a long time.
She said: “Until you came to me, it was your problem, and now, when you are in my chair, it is mine. You can relax, now I’m going to strain.”
At that time, it was exactly what you need. Nothing that the dentist did, I could not do myself. My whole part of the task was to come and trust.
The mental stress subsided and the issue began to be resolved in the only correct way.
Later, I realized that in cases where help is needed, my main responsibility is to choose the right one to whom I should trust, that this is not a trifling question either.
Many years later, working with people who need psychological help, I understand how difficult it is sometimes for a person to realize the need for the help of a specialist in this area.
If a bad tooth or an injury to the body leaves no doubt that only a specialist will help, then in matters of the psyche, a person can wallow for as long as possible.
Or, when strength is running out and the lack of results becomes obvious, he goes to a specialist with hope "Give up the problem" just talking about her as a dentist.
And this is where the difference between a medical service and working with a psychologist / analyst lies
Whatever neat box with the problem you bring and whatever bill you put on top, the psychologist / psychotherapist will not take this problem away from you.
The results will depend only on the quality of your participation in the process and your willingness to change from within
It happens that a person, tormented by suffering, suppressed emotions, a heap of resentment and pain, needs so much to finally take it all out of himself that even a simple verbalization is sufficient to alleviate the condition.
However, if real change is needed, and obviously, speaking is not enough.
A specialist can help you see your question from other angles that are unfamiliar to you, identify blind spots, discover yourself and your real needs under a heap of familiar patterns and beliefs.
This process can be unpleasant, traumatic and takes time
You need to be ready for it, you need to want it in order to withstand.
You won't be able to give up the problem.
It is not realistic to buy the result.
So? "Sama-sama-sama?"
- Not "herself" anymore. You are with someone who accepts you with a problem without a personal relationship to it and observes the changes. You are reflected. You are growing.
Help as such is not possible
Only interaction is possible
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