2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
I thought incest was rare in our society. In my practice, every fourth female client has been subjected to incest either by her father or by her uncle, older brother or grandfather. Incestuous trauma is also considered to be touching the intimate areas of the girl's body without direct sexual intercourse.
Mothers and grandmothers in 90% of cases remain "blind and deaf" to what is happening and even when their daughters complain, they do not believe them, or they accuse them of being guilty or of lying. This stems from the fact that mothers themselves are emotionally immature, codependent, traumatized women. They are afraid of losing a relationship with a man, they are afraid of conflicts, responsibility for protecting their child. They do not realize that by not noticing or denying incest, they become silent complicit in the sexual abuse of their daughters. The trauma of incest does not allow a woman to live in peace, she is tormented by memories, she is not satisfied with relationships with men, her trust in them is at zero. The personal adult life of such women is complex and full of pain. Mothers, grandmothers, aunts, sisters, be sensitive to the slightest hints of child girls (adolescents) in your family about sexual abuse by fathers, grandfathers, uncles and older brothers. About 25% of women have already gone through this hell and these actions of older men in the family are for them an eternal nightmare in their head and their adult life. Years pass, but the memory haunts them, the heart seeks retribution, because such things cannot be forgiven! Therefore, here's what you should pay attention to:
1. Does any of the sexually mature men sleep with your daughter in the same bed? Even if sometimes! This is an alarming signal!
2. Does any of them bathe your girl over 5 years old? Better and safer if mom or grandmother does it.
3. Do any of the sexually mature men enter the bathroom or toilet when your daughter is there?
4. Does any of the male relatives go with your daughter to the shower, bathroom, bath (does he wash with her)?
5. Does one of the men walk with naked genitals, explaining this by dressing up, in front of your girl?
6. When hugging, does the male relative touch the girl's genitals, buttocks and breasts (even jokingly)?
7. Doesn't she use undressing in punishments, for example, taking off her underwear to spank her butt, or undressing a girl as a punishment?
All these are alarming signals that a tragedy may be taking place behind your back or right in front of your eyes. I'm not just sounding the alarm, I know how often this happens in families and not only traumatized clients tell me about it, but also fathers and older brothers who committed such implicit violence against a girl. Those who confessed to this are those men - rare exceptions to whom the feeling of guilt haunted. But most men are silent about this and, worst of all, they consider it normal or are simply forced out of memory. Particular attention should be paid to stepfathers here. Their hands are untied by the lack of blood ties with the girl. They do not have this additional brake: "This is my daughter!" Take care of your daughters, dear mothers!
Recommended:
Rich Snowdon "Dealing With Incest Rapists: Excuses, Excuses, Excuses"
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