What's The Matter With Me? Signs Of Trouble Or Just An Accident?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Our experience and knowledge are sometimes difficult and expensive for us. Where to go if something is disturbing, but it is completely incomprehensible what it is?

I remember how during pregnancy I told everyone about the unusual sensation inside, and tried to describe it in some confusion, because it was the first time I encountered it. Friends and doctors shrugged their shoulders in bewilderment. And only my spiritual midwife widened her eyes in amazement: "It's just heartburn!" But I didn't know anything about “just heartburn” and spent more than a month trying to understand what was wrong with me, while after talking, just a couple of simple tips stopped my torment. In life, we often face more serious problems, but we also do not know what they are, and some of them relate to the subtle sphere of our soul. However, we are too busy to pay attention to the "little things" and of course economical to go to specialists with them. We can live with "incomprehensible symptoms" for a month, a year, five, until they turn into illness or trouble. And only much later we realize that some troubles could have been foreseen - the idea of the benefits of early diagnosis has not been canceled.

Sometimes I am horrified at how clearly it was possible to see future problems, and how blind people are, simply because they do not know how to recognize warning signs. That is why I decided to share some of them visible to the “naked” eye.

After all, some "oddities" (your own or those of those close to you) are not oddities at all, but an insistence on seeing what is important inside. I had to work with people who have lived with these manifestations for 5, 10 … 20 years. They were not well, but they did not understand what was wrong with them. The people around them told them about weakness of will, bad temper, excessive impressionability, doctors called them simulators, but this did not change anything. "Oddities" over time destroyed them: they lost strength, families, jobs, property, money, and sometimes - life itself.

Some of the things described are probably familiar to you firsthand or you've seen it from others. At the same time, I will make a reservation, each time we will talk about a stable manifestation, which is well known to you literally from a half-word. If the described feeling has been with you a couple of times or is generally unfamiliar, you can safely skip this point. The connection of the described symptoms with negative consequences is, of course, not a law, but a tendency that does not work quickly, but is quite stable.

There is no place for me in life (he often uses the words: “I want to find my place in life”, “I cannot find my place”, “I am not at ease”, “Soul is not in place”, “I cannot find a place for myself”)

This is not about the period of looking for a job and a purpose, as you understand, but about a stable feeling of the absence of my place in life, or that “I am not living my life”. Sometimes it is accompanied by the feeling “everything is like through cotton wool / through glass”, everything is difficult, all the time you need to focus with effort on people, actions, life.

Which means: These familiar everyday words can retain another important meaning. Sometimes it happens that at a deep unconscious level we are connected with someone from our kind, especially if this person had a difficult fate or he was disrespected in the family. This problem is relevant for many nations, where the millstones of history have sometimes twisted whole generations: a Nazi grandfather; uncle, missing or perished in the camps, long-dead father's brother … But the laws of the clan are such that all members without exception have the right to belong to the family, so when someone is forgotten, a descendant appears through whom the clan "remembers" rejected. In fact, such a person falls into a merger with someone else's fate and loses his own. So he really does not have his own place in life, because he finds himself in someone else's, in order to remember and re-"turn on" the forgotten. Sometimes such "fusion syndromes" also occur with siblings who died in infancy or aborted, as well as with ancestors with a difficult fate.

At the same time, it is important to note that a person who falls under the influence of the fusion syndrome does not have to be familiar with such a relative of his or even at least in any way aware of him. We are talking about deeply unconscious processes driven by an archaic force called ancestral conscience.

What is dangerous and what it leads to: a person in "fusion syndrome" does not live his life. In some cases, he generally weakly identifies his feelings and needs. “Not your own” life does not imply family, SELF-realization, career and money. The main unconscious task of such a person is to serve the laws of the system. He is a prisoner who often does not even realize it.

“You see,” Natalya almost whispers from a small regional town, and suddenly makes a reservation, “I have absolutely no place in my life! Well … that is, - she corrects herself embarrassedly, - I just never had a home. I even lived in other people's apartments in a corner, behind a curtain. " She looks about 60, and it seems she wants to dissolve all the time. In the course of work, it turns out that she had a twin sister who died in childbirth. Mom, of course, knew, but did not want to upset loved ones and did not tell anyone. The sister was forgotten in the family, but all her life, unconsciously, Natalya "remembered" her twin. Some time after work, Natalya urgently leaves for Gelendzhik to consider the option of buying a house with a garden that suddenly appeared there. After work Natasha suddenly remembers: “We have a children's grave in the enclosure! We asked my mother whose it was, but she answered: I don’t know, it’s not ours”…

Fear of sleeping without light. Periodically one sees figures in black, or dark figures with their backs, figures in a hood

Which means: the excluded members of the system are quite often indicated by such a seemingly harmless sign as the fear of sleeping without light. Well, who was not afraid to sleep without light, especially in childhood! However, if the manifestation is steadily manifested in adulthood, and you periodically see dark figures, you should deal with this more carefully. Quite often people describe these figures as standing with their backs, figures in a hood pulled over their eyes, i.e. the faces of these people are not visible and the very prospect of looking at a face is usually terrifying, my clients call them "scary", "threatening." The combination of these symptoms often indicates that someone in the family has been forgotten or disrespected.

What is dangerous and what it leads to: unlike "I have no place in life," manifestation does not necessarily indicate "fusion syndrome." A person sees a dark figure as a separate one, but it undoubtedly influences him through anxiety, fears, phobias, etc., trying to “reach out” to a kind through one of its members. This situation, if it cannot be resolved in this form, may be a harbinger of the "fusion syndrome" for someone from subsequent generations. Living with a constant sense of anxiety is very burdensome for those who are familiar with this phenomenon.

Maria asked about a phobia. In the course of work, she sees the figure of a man in a black cloak, who stands with his back. She goes numb, at the same time wants and is terribly afraid to look into his face: “This is death itself, now he will turn, and there, under the hood, the skull and eye sockets are empty. My palms are already cold with horror …”As it turns out, her great-grandfather with a difficult fate is excluded and forgotten in her family. After Maria "gets to know" her great-grandfather again, he is no longer so scary, she sees him as a person and can finally hug him. After some time after work, the phobia goes away.

Inna, a mother of four, a tired housewife, with her husband on eternal business trips, lack of strength and a timid dream of self-realization, believes that at her 40s, success is no longer possible, that there will not be enough strength. As one of my homework assignments, I ask Inna to paint a picture called "Success". I open the drawing that came by mail, and for a second I "sag" on the chair … In front of me in the drawing is a large … female vagina. "Inna, what exactly did you draw?" - "Like that, SUCCESS!". "Mmm … so, in your understanding, success looks like this?"

“You know,” she thinks for a second, “I also wanted to paint a black spot on the top right … it looks like a man standing with his back … A woman. … In a hood … Her expression changes … - Zhenya, this is death! I'm scared…". In the course of work, it turns out that Inna had a grandmother who spent her whole life "with children" and died in the next childbirth. The family gradually forgot her … but not the family conscience. Inna remembered her grandmother with all her destiny and expressed her solidarity to her.

NB! I can't help but notice that the “vision” of the entities of the lower world, vivid stable images that cannot be distinguished from reality, voices, etc. may also indicate the need to consult a neurologist, psychiatrist and undergo an MRI of the brain.

The feeling that an invisible rope or elastic is tied to me, and I can advance in life no further than it will allow me

Which means: sometimes in I call this experience "Goat on a String Syndrome", because life with it resembles the trajectory of a goat tied to a peg and able to move only within a certain radius, because the rope does not let it go any further. Back - please. Forward - no!

If this is so for you, then most likely you are doing something in life that is new to your kind. For example, your ancestors for many centuries deep - peasants and workers, and you decided to write a book about nano-technologies in the field of Mars exploration. The generic system seems to say: "don't go there, there is unknown, suddenly it is dangerous for you!"

To better understand the “logic” of this invisible force, let's analyze a simplified example: imagine that your only grown-up daughter suddenly decided to change the hereditary philological faculty of Moscow State University for an aviation school in Syzran (“It's so romantic in the sky!”), And before that go to a summer job in America ("Mom, if you work as a topless waitress, such a tip! Enough for school in a year!"). Give yourself the opportunity to feel your reaction:)) …

Your generic system looks at your "freaks" with the book in much the same way. The situation heats up when there are people with a difficult fate in the system or all the same excluded members of the system. Unconscious solidarity with them "draws" the very circle or limit beyond which you cannot go in your own life. The book is not going well.

We work with Peter on business issues, the profit in his company has reached a plateau and is not growing. He is the only prosperous member of his family where it is “customary” to live in poverty. A "good boy" in the family clearly does not need a second "Audi" and a large house outside the city. Peter says that whenever he tries to reach new financial frontiers in his work, he feels an invisible limit that will not let him go further. I am like a “bull on arable land” (a tall, broad-shouldered handsome man, he is definitely not a goat - a bull!) - I can only walk along a given trajectory, nowhere else). When I ask him to portray what he feels, he easily picks up a 19-liter bottle of water, then a second, then asks another man to clasp him from behind … and now he is hanging on him, standing with two bottles, tearing off his legs from the ground, a grown man, and Peter, leaning forward, wheezes: "This is how I feel." A bull in a furrow with a heavy burden, he is trying to break out of the "usual" standard of living in the system and "carries on himself" a couple of difficult destinies from the family. At 38 he has a pacemaker. After work, he will say that he has never felt so easy and free. Profits suddenly start to rise.

Feeling guilty for literally everything that happens. "Seeking" people

Which means: guilt is the regulator of the conscience of the clan, it clearly indicates whether everything is okay in our family system, whether there are forgotten, disrespected, disadvantaged members in it. In this sense, the roots of guilt lie far beyond our personality and consciousness - in our family.

What is dangerous and where does it lead: as in the other cases described, here a person unconsciously becomes a hostage to situations that have happened a long time ago, but have not received their "correct" resolution. He does not live his life freely and fully, but is in the service of the family system, a captain on someone else's ship.

Olesya is a successful manager in a major multinational company and a “seeker”, as her friends say about her, while working, admits that her life is extremely difficult because of a fatal guilt for almost everything and everyone. Her career is in question, because the new position requires a completely different mental organization. She is unable to make unpopular decisions, fire people. In the work we will find out that Olesya's mother had not had an abortion before, i.e. she had an older sister, whom she “has been looking for” all her life. Acutely sensing the “missing link”, she unconsciously blames, because she herself lives, but her sister no longer exists. While working, Olesya categorically denies the possibility of abortion by her mother (“We talked a lot about this topic”), but after a month he writes to me: “It's incredible, of course, but it turned out that the parents met in their youth, and at the beginning of the relationship they parted, at that moment, the father had a girlfriend, she became pregnant, his parents were against the child, and she had an abortion, and then the father returned to his mother again. Zhenya, I really have an older sister!"

It is paradoxical that my mother “suddenly” herself will want to tell 40-year-old Olesya right after our work. Career has improved. A new high position has been received, he writes to me: “Today is the first official day. It went great - congratulations come from all over the world. Team on all continents - 25 countries. It is terribly interesting to meet everyone:) Even in September, I will fly to America with pleasure for the first time. It used to be torture for me:)"

Stable sensations: “everything is like through cotton wool”, “everything is like through glass”. You need to focus all the time, to concentrate on the environment. Inability to set any goals, want something

It's about fusion again. This is how the client describes her feelings in words and in a drawing. Here is the above-described "radius" and the feeling "behind the glass". In the mail, the client calls the attached file with the picture "Hoop":

I stand in the center of a circle with a diameter of three meters. Inside the circle there is emptiness and silence, and beyond the radius there is life, movement, changes. But I cannot go beyond this radius and nothing goes inside. The radius for me is like the horizon, I try to move from the center of the circle, but nothing happens, the edge does not come close, it is equidistant from me. And a feeling of powerlessness arises and a misunderstanding of what I am doing wrong …

I ask one more client - Irina to show HOW she lives. He lays down on the floor face down, right in the palace, asks - here, next to him, put someone else and here … As a result, he finds himself in the center of a square of lying figures. These are significant deceased. Irina is in the space of death with them.

- How do you?

- Well, I'm in the nest, - reports in a colorless voice from the carpet. I ask again: "In the family?")) (What to do, and in such work we sometimes joke). - Nothing, now we will give you a new nest))!"

Vitaly, a successful leader at a large enterprise, addresses a complete breakdown, lack of vital energy. In the work we see that Vitaly's grandfather served in the NKVD, presumably in the firing squads. As a result, Vitaly himself is experiencing a "fusion syndrome" with numerous murdered victims. The victims do not ask Vitaly for anything, but the deep solidarity on his part prompts him to remember them. Vitaly "carries them" in his soul and his vitality is not enough for anything else. I put the figure "Vital energy" first in the arrangement. The deputy listens to himself and after a couple of minutes asks: “Oh, something is not good for me at all, can I sit down … no, I’d better lie down - it’s really bad for me”. In the course of work, Vitaly can see the reason for the loss of strength - it is very difficult to look at the victims, but the figure of the NKVD comes forward, covering Vitaly's grandfather: “These are my victims, I took them away, not he … don't blame him, he just did what I did ordered. " A few years after this work, Vitaly has a new level in his career, his strength is added, now he is fascinated by the issues of self-knowledge and development.

After work, such people seem to open their eyes to life: it is! She is interesting! Energy and goals gradually appear.

The feeling that "not alive enough", that one wants to be even more alive (in general, the word "alive" seems very attractive, important)

A rather heavy expression of "fusion syndrome". As a rule, it leaves an imprint on all spheres of life with a lack of strength, a feeling that you are not like everyone else, that something is globally wrong

One of my clients, teachers, being in a merger syndrome, called the course for businessmen "Living Company". It seemed to her that not only the people around her, but also the businesses were "not alive enough." Later she figured out that it was herself.

Olga turned to me about the fact that 4 years ago, joy disappeared from her life, and now she is like “lifeless”. She associated it with a new job, loneliness and much more, but I felt: not that. We talked about her life, past marriage, little son … 4 years old. Stop. "Olga, tell me about the circumstances of the birth of your son." The girl is clearly hesitating: “nnu …, in fact, he is … adopted by me. But I am not telling anyone … you must understand me, his mother, she is … (with obvious disgust) an alcoholic! He shouldn't know her! " I keep asking, she is distracted by the thought that it is the biological mother that is “mother number one”, and she is just “the second mother”. At this moment, she seems to come to life and gives many arguments about what a wonderful mother she is. Not like “that”.

On a conscious level, Olga protects her son from traumatic information, but deep inside, where we are all united and connected, she is in solidarity with the "alcoholic" who gave birth to "her" child. She "gives" her joy to her: you have not known the joy of life, and I will not allow myself either. Out of regret. Out of love. Out of solidarity with you.

Soon, through pain, tears, aggression, she can look at the mother of her son: “I see you - she pronounces syllables. - I know that you were unbearable, and you did everything in your power. I can take care of your child … my child. We are both his mothers: you are the first, and I am the second, I will take care of him and tell him about you when the time comes."

Needless to say, this work does the most important thing for the child, knowing about his own mother will prevent a number of difficult dynamics and events in his life.

When fusion syndrome occurs with someone who has died, the person "does not live or die." In fact, he is alive, but metaphysically he is "in the death zone." Family, career, financial sphere can gradually collapse. One of the clients after work said sharply about this dynamics, but definitely: “I understood why I had no money. Why are they to the deceased!"

Feelings taken over. Strange deep sadness, incomparable with the events of life (melancholy, other heavy inexplicable feelings)

Which means: If your life was relatively smooth, but there are always heavy inexplicable feelings (bitterness, longing, anxiety, fears, etc.) in it, this may mean that you are experiencing them “for other” members of the clan. The laws of the genus are arranged in such a way that "give place" not only to excluded people, but also to what was once compressed, not lived through, repressed, because not only all family members have the right to belong, but also their experiences. If a grandmother buried her children in the war and did not really burn them out, then her great-granddaughter throughout her life may experience inexplicable bitterness and despair, and not know about their source.

Jacqueline has been living for a long time with a heavy feeling inside, she is afraid to even start talking about him, so unpleasant, scary: "There is something dark, not mine, I did not have such experiences, there is some kind of horror!" In the work we find out that grandmother Jacqueline, who gave her whole life to children, was abandoned by them and died completely alone. “They didn't even feed her, she practically rotted alive.” Of course, it was not customary in the family to talk about it. After a long work, Jacqueline mourns for a long time the fate of her grandmother. Gradually comes the understanding that this is the case. After a while, she can “let go” of her grandmother and her melancholy. She has her own life and her feelings in front of her.

The interrupted movement of love. Distrust of the world, a sense of separation from the world, expectation of collapse, anxiety, suspiciousness, endless survival

Which means: Of course, these various symptoms can have a huge number of reasons, but one of them can be the so-called "interrupted movement of love" - a situation when a child was temporarily separated from his mother at the age from zero to 3-5 years. For someone, separation could be critical for a week, for someone it lasted months or years, in any case basic trust in the world was violated in it, a skeleton of muscle tension in the body, energy blocks, anxiety, resilience, a sense of "separateness" from the world. By the way, these people cannot be confused with others by the special expression of their eyes - they seem to have returned from the war, and even if they are children, there is an impression that they know about the world, something that their more naive peers will face only in difficult times of my life.

What is dangerous and what it leads to: they can't love me just like that. And in general, "just like that" little happens. The world is unreliable. It can collapse at any moment. Relationships are shaky. To open the door to anyone (even the Lord God himself) is dangerous. With such an understanding of life, these people have a very difficult time. They need special support and professional help.

Tatiana was given to live with her grandmother in another city after the first year of her life. As an adult, she can remember almost nothing except the episode where her mother puts her on the train and leaves without looking back, and her grandmother, shaking her head tragically, will quietly say: "Your mother does not love you at all, Tanyusha." She will grow up with a feeling of constant anxiety and leave for a distant country, as if realizing a huge gap with her homeland, parents, and family. Later, she divorces her husband and he, in a fit of anger on the doorstep, will shout in her face: “I have not! You understand NO! What you need!”… How sometimes exactly our loved ones grasp the essence of what is happening. The husband really cannot do for Tanya what is vital for her - to resolve the internal conflict with her parents: to feel an unconditional strong blood connection with mom and dad, to accept them completely and completely. With acute mental pain, she will begin to seek help and through this will get a chance to heal the bleeding wound of rejection and abandonment for many years.

An excommunicated child, without love and mother's affection, makes a decision within himself: “I will never show you how much I love you, mother. You will never know how much I need you. Subsequently, this decision passes to all emotionally significant people: friends, marriage partner, their children. You can see this process here. A famous film about a boy named John who spent 9 days in the Orphanage while his mother gave birth to his sister (you can find it in the public domain)

Accidents and injuries that have occurred more than once over the past five years (sometimes at the same time of the year)

Which means: one of the most dangerous manifestations, reflecting the dynamics of the movement of the soul after someone significant who has died. Sometimes she is called "I will follow you …"

What is dangerous and what it leads to: it is essentially a movement into death. Many others can be associated with this manifestation - a lack of family, money (why does a dying person need money?) And even childhood failure in school.

The mother of 15-year-old Alexandra is worried that she does not want to go to school. In addition, accidents and injuries have occurred in Alexandra's life for three years in a row. Mom doesn't know how to help her daughter. In the work we see that Alexandra wants to go after her beloved grandfather, who died recently. He is dear to her, and she cannot survive the break, her soul asks for reunification. Will such a child want to learn? No. Because there is no need. Academic progress returns when the work is completed, Sasha still loves his grandfather, but knows that now he invisibly supports her: live, granddaughter, study, be happy! This work was done more than 6 years ago, recently Sasha wrote to me that she got married, she has a son, she is happy.

Inability to set goals (no strength, no time, it does not work)

Some of the dynamics described above may be reasons why you are not being able to freely move forward in life.

They prevent you from feeling connected with yourself, realizing your needs, setting clear goals, and living happily and easily. When a person is weighed down by the described unconscious mechanisms, he can no longer clearly look into his future and plan his happy life.

This, of course, is not all of the possible manifestations. And of course, not all symptoms necessarily indicate generic manifestations, but I can talk about something else.

And although some of the examples sound scary, I ask you not to be afraid, but just remember: if you see something like this in yourself, this is already a step towards awareness and transformation. Most often it is "treated"! Moreover, today we are given amazing opportunities to heal ourselves and move forward.

March 5, 2016. Montenegro, Budva