2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
One long-standing but remarkable story.
One day a client came to my office - a young, decently dressed and quite handsome man. He sits down in a chair opposite and begins to talk about his problem - relations with women do not work out in any way. Moreover, all the time the contact breaks down after the first date (he met, as a rule, on the Internet). The girls quickly lost interest in him, looked away, bored, or even made disgruntled grimaces. And then they did not call back or refused to meet. If they argued, then "you and I are too different", "I'm sorry, but I didn't like you", "well, somehow …".
The young man was quite intelligent, his speech was literate. But I began to guess about the reasons why the girls did not want to communicate with him. It dawned on me the moment he started talking about his mother.
- Probably, this is my problem. Here, I remember, my mother often told me that girls would not like such a "squishy" like me. Like, I have to go in for sports. Maybe all the complexes are from this? Yes, and my grandmother was constantly unhappy with me - in general, I have not been good with women since childhood … Maybe there was some kind of childhood trauma? I don't understand …
When full awareness overtook me, I, holding my breath for a second, nevertheless said:
- I think I understand why the girls do not want to communicate with you.
There is hope in his eyes, he even sat up in his chair.
- Smell. Sorry, you smell very, very strong. So much so that, excuse me, I'll open the window.
The smell was really terrible. The scent of a man's rocking chair tenfold. Moreover, it was unlikely that the man neglected hygiene - the hair looked very clean and well-groomed, the clothes were clearly new, not worn out. It looks like something with microflora or hormones. The young man, hearing about the smell, froze for a few moments, and then blurted out:
- And these bitches were silent ?! Well, at least one honestly said - it stinks, they say, from you! And then "you will meet another", "you deserve more", "you and I are so different!" or even silence !!!
Like this. And you are mothers, complexes, childhood traumas …
Recommended:
EARLY INJURY: IDENTITY PROBLEMS
Traumatic experiences are terrible, difficult and seem overwhelming. Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is associated with events such as wars, terrorist attacks, car accidents, natural disasters, and acts of violence. There is another type of PTSD called Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), which results from prolonged exposure to traumatic situations rather than from a single incident.
CLOSE AS INJURY
Doctor of Philosophy, Julie Reshet, says that there is no person who would be completely self-sufficient, would not need support, would not be traumatized by the people closest to him and would not be in a dominant relationship. Why is a self-sufficient, independent and untrained person a stupid myth?
WHAT HAPPENS TO A WOMAN WHEN THE INFLUENCE OF INJURY ON HER WANTS?
What happens to a woman when trauma ceases to have strong power over her? How does she look at things that previously seemed understandable? And most importantly, is she herself the same person or is she already completely unfamiliar? One morning, on a typical rainy day, she woke up with strange thoughts in her head.
ABILITY THERAPY. THE INJURY OF THE ABANDONED. INJURY OF THE THROWER
Abandonment - for us, this is the feeling of a person with whom we have unilaterally stopped communicating. At the same time, the one who quit did not allow the separation procedure to take place. He simply disappeared. He did not say: “You were important to me,” or “It was too difficult for me to be with you,” he did not thank, did not express any feelings, no attitude, but simply got out of contact.
INTERNAL INJURY CHILD (TRAP INJURY)
INTERNAL INJURED CHILD (INJURY TRAP) Where there is no childhood there is no maturity either. Françoise Dolto. Grow into really healthy family - here's real luck. Robin Skinner In psychotherapy and in life, one can quite often meet with the "
