2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Unexpectedly for me, my article on the legitimacy of violence caused a violent reaction and a lot of comments on social networks (I mean not on social networks in general, but on my pages on Vkontakte and Facebook). Most of the comments are supportive, with people sharing their outrage and bitterness that domestic violence exists and children suffer from it. But there were other remarks in which commentators proved the USEFULNESS (!!!) of such violence. Like, one slap on the head - it's okay, he'll grow up as a man.
After I coped with my bewilderment and indignation about these comments and these people, the idea of domestic violence advocating, I began to analyze their train of thought, their logic, or rather - not logic, but cognitive errors in their logic, as a result of which they come to such monstrous conclusions.
And one of the main ones is to dehumanize the child. The child is perceived not as a person with his pain, feelings, not as a person, but as a kind of object of "education". Such a "black box", the undesirable behavior of which can be corrected by a slap or a slap. And then what happens inside this "black box" - the parent or the propagandist of domestic violence is not interested.
I am also talking about the child's direct experiences that he experiences during an act of violence, and about its consequences in the form of psychological trauma, deformation of the child's personality towards sadism, strengthening of a psychopathic radical in his psyche, etc. Ordinary people, not psychologists, can and not to know about these mechanisms of the psyche, but are they able to see the pain and suffering of the child directly at the moment of the act of aggression that they commit against him? Or also not? Or is your own momentary convenience more important than the child's pain and its consequences both for him and for the whole family?
In my childhood we had a tube black and white TV. Soviet production, of course. It was called, I think, "Record" or something similar. From time to time, his image disappeared and in order for it to reappear, he had to bang his fist on TV. Either the contact of some lamp was loose, and it fell into place from the impact, or something else was happening.
People who spank or slap their child on the head (or advocate parental violence against children) treat children like this television. Not behaving the way I want? He knocked - and he worked differently, right. And the child's experiences are empty, the TV does not worry about being beaten.
Among other things - our condemnation of such a parent, indignation at such his behavior, there is also a cognitive error. The parent believes that his child is not a person, a person not only able to experience pain and other negative experiences, but also a person who, for example, has a sense of dignity. There is a lack of understanding that domestic violence does not allow a child to form as a full-fledged harmonious personality, not experiencing deep pathological anxiety in front of the world, a healthy and self-confident person.
What to do about it? It may be worth intervening if the child is being beaten in front of your eyes, perhaps doing something else. Most importantly, I really want the very idea of the permissibility of physical violence against a child, its social legitimacy to become a thing of the past.
Recommended:
Internal Conflict Of The Schizoid Personality. Difference From Other Personality Types
Tim Burton Schizoid personalities are often considered strange, out of this world because of their need to maintain distance from others, unusual, eccentric behavior. The schizoid personality resembles a rebel who rebelled against the framework and rules of a standardized society.
Internal Conflict Of A Hysterical Personality. Difference From Narcissistic Personality
The hysterical type of personality today is usually called histrionic from the Latin "histrio", in turn borrowed from the Etruscan language, the concept of "actor on stage". Thus, "histrionic" means theatrical, superemotional.
Difference Between Violence And Non-violence
Violence for me is when I do or allow myself to do something that I do not want, which I do not choose. My will can be suppressed in different ways - by deception (using misleading intellectual constructions), intimidation or unexpected penetration into the intimate area, which leads to a stupor.
The Legitimacy Of Violence
Unfortunately, physical violence in the family is still a reality in our life. I mean both husbands 'abuse of wives and parents' abuse of children. Many of our citizens have experienced physical violence from their parents, many children are experiencing it now.
Obsessive-compulsive Personality. Difference From Other Personality Types
Perhaps the Japanese and Germans can be classified as an obsessive-compulsive nation: discipline, dedication, severity, love of order, responsibility, workaholism, perfectionism. The Japanese have a particularly acute sense of civic and social duty.
