2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
1. Sociopath
The hallmark of a sociopathic man is a high level of aggressiveness, rapid satiety, boredom and the need for some kind of shaking experience. A sociopath loves to break the law and morality. Most often he is deprived of empathy, does not know how to talk about his feelings, has a great passion for manipulation, loves to brag about his victories, his strength. The main psychological defense of a sociopath is omnipotent control, the need to feel power over a person. Unlike the "border guard" who can manipulate unconsciously, the sociopath manipulates deliberately and, moreover, loves to come up with various manipulative schemes, observing how the victim is tormented by his tricks or how he managed to deceive someone.
A psychopath differs from a sociopath only in that he does not openly break the law and often disguises his actions with decent external behavior.
At first, the sociopath charms the victim with a demonstration of his charm, strength, power. For the first time, a woman feels herself with a sociopath under reliable protection. Sociopaths are often attracted to women who grew up without a father, initially having a victim complex. They dream of meeting a domineering man who will protect them from danger and punish all offenders. What a sociopath demonstrates very clearly at first.
A classmate of mine, who had been an outcast in the class for a long time, started dating a sociopathic guy in a parallel class who kept all the parallels in fear. In a moment, everyone began to treat her with respect, tk. her newly-made friend Kolya promised to "break" everyone who touches his girlfriend with a finger.
What can I say, sex with a sociopath is bright, exciting at first. Who watched the movie "Wild Orchid", "Sliver", "Selfie" and the like will understand.
This summer, in the evening, going out to the balcony of an apartment building, I watched the following scene: there was a strong thunderstorm, rain, thunder and lightning on the street. Suddenly, a naked woman ran onto the balcony of the house opposite, a man ran up behind her, grabbed her by the hair, bent her over the railing (and it was on the 10th floor), and in this form, in the rain, they had sex in front of other residents of the house, it should be noted, with animal passion, not at all embarrassed, because shamelessness is also a trait of a sociopath, unlike a narcissist, for whom it is very important to save face.
The sociopath quickly becomes bored with regular sex, so he can often resort to paraphilia, to extreme types of sex, even at risk to his life. To make the impressions more intense, he can use drugs and alcohol before sex.
Gradually, as the victim becomes more and more dependent on the sociopath, he begins to show his aggression towards her more vividly. During a quarrel, he can beat his partner, tie her up and leave her lying there for a long time.
Psychopaths like to mock the victim in a sophisticated way so that their beatings are not visible (choking with a pillow, for example), and then "gaslight" that she came up with all this, that he is an exemplary husband and father. If the psychopath's disorder gets out of hand, he may even kill the victim / opponent. In a rage, overwhelmed by revenge, the psychopath knows no boundaries or mercy.
He can also chase the victim for a long time, threaten with violence. It is most dangerous if a psychopath is endowed with power (a deputy or works in "bodies", belongs to criminal structures).
Also, a psychopath / sociopath does not know how to be faithful, it will not work with him to talk about feelings, because he is unable to express them, in contrast to the manifestations of rudeness.
As a child, the sociopath was often subjected to cruelty from adults, no one was particularly interested in his feelings, and therefore the skill of showing empathy, empathy and expression of their emotions was not formed. The environment of a sociopath from childhood encouraged him to be physical strength, cunning, endurance, restraint of emotions.
2. Narcissus
A narcissist in a relationship is very dependent on his own shame. Shame in the narcissist was formed from the fear of inappropriateness: in childhood, parents either constantly compared him to someone, or set exorbitant expectations.
The narcissist is very afraid to show his imperfection, and therefore strives for the ideal in everything: in appearance, in clothes, in social status, in everyday life, in choosing a partner, a specialist. The narcissist is concerned with both personal prestige and those of the people who surround him.
In this regard, he, at first, idealizes the woman. And for the time being, everything is perfect in their relationship: a vivid romance, gentlemanly courtship, gifts, wonderful, sensual sex. At first, it is very important for a narcissist to make a strong impression on a woman, to make her believe that this has never happened to her before and is unlikely to happen again.
At the beginning of a relationship, the narcissist appears as the prince that many women dream of: handsome, well-groomed, imposing, attentive, tactful, generous, romantic …
However, the narcissist does not just choose a woman for himself. Most often, she has what he needs at the moment: connections, opportunities, position, or simply personality traits that support his self-esteem (constant admiration for him) or can contribute to his personal growth.
And now, when a woman is already madly in love with a narcissist, he turns on the manipulator, trying to subjugate her and appropriate what he needed: to gain control over her, money for business development, to pay off the debt, rewrite her apartment, etc..d.
You often hear stories from the wives of narcissists: I was once successful, I had my own business, an apartment, a car. Now I am a housewife, I registered the apartment for my husband, and he drives his mistress in my car.
In addition to the loss of status and freedom, women, as a rule, also lose their former self-worth. This is because the narcissist, having subordinated a woman to his control, having made a dependent on himself emotionally, begins to devalue her in order to gain power over everything else and assert himself. If at first he praised a woman as a mistress, now she hears one criticism from him. Gradually, she begins to make sure that she behaves like a log in bed, and in order not to lose such an amazing man, she must please him in everything and put up with everything, even with his mistresses. When a woman realizes that she has fallen into a trap of emotional, and, quite possibly, material dependence, then she can escape from it only at the cost of tremendous effort and sacrifice.
When the narcissist realizes that this woman has nothing more to give him, he either leaves her, or becomes extremely manipulative and cruel with her.
The narcissist is often unable to understand his feelings, because in childhood he was constantly guided by the opinions of others about himself. For example, a narcissist asks a psychologist to explain whether he loves a person or not, because he himself cannot understand and feel it. Exactly also, he cannot recognize the feelings of other people, he is practically devoid of the ability to reflect.
For this reason, a woman is denied access to his emotional experiences. If the narcissist speaks about love, then by memorized phrases from films, books, what they want to hear from him.
In sex, the narcissist likes to show power over his partner, often behaves dominant, but sex for him is, basically, just a way to control another person and receive confirmation of his own grandeur, incomparability. Sex does not bring complete satisfaction to the narcissist. he is isolated from his emotions, and therefore is content with physical release.
The narcissist strives for separation as soon as he begins to feel the first shoots of affection.
It is humiliating for a narcissist to feel emotionally dependent on someone else. Therefore, the narcissist loves the game of "approach-distance" in relationships.
Both sociopaths and narcissists, due to lack or lack of empathy, cannot feel the emotions of another person, and therefore they want to see them. This need leads to the fact that they "rock" their victims, constantly provoking them to emotional outbursts.
This behavior is typical in general for the border group. The feeling of inner emptiness and boredom causes the need to feel alive - to evoke an affective reaction in the partner: anger, tears, tantrums, a fight, and even suicidal blackmail.
Having received some proof of love and an emotional shake-up for a while, such people can experience a brief peace, similar to an emotional orgasm. Also, affective outbursts allow you to feel both greater sexual arousal and brighter orgasmic discharge.
Dear readers, do not miss my new articles on sexual behavior of other personality types very soon
Author: Burkova Elena Viktorovna
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