2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The basis for this exercise was the whole exercise that I presented to you yesterday:
My favorite exercise for relieving anxiety. Self-therapy session
The basic exercise algorithm is here:
One-stop help for dealing with fears, guilt, low self-esteem
Modification for working with a pair of "Melody for two voices"
- Directly during the session, clients, each on their sheet or in a notebook, write a title. It can be something like this: "Beloved (name / intimate address) you are the most important person in the world for me, because: …"
- Then they give as many epithets about the partner as he is. If we are talking about people who have been married for more than twenty years, you can write the number of epithets, according to the number of years, how many they are together. It is important that there are so many of them, so that everyone does a certain inner work.
- The epithets "first, second …" are being formed. For example: “Firstly, you are strong, secondly, you are kind, etc.
- I give clients, initially, especially little time, no more than 10 minutes, so that they work in a stream.
- From time to time I ask: “Ivan, how many have you got? And you, Maria? " Group dynamics and healthy competition “who will write good words about a partner faster.
- Usually women cope with this task faster and men begin to get nervous so that the man does not feel defeated, I allow him to spy on the Internet for the request: "words for a beloved woman."
- When the list is ready, each partner reads it to the other. This is usually a very touching moment.
- As a homework assignment, I ask the couple to choose a melody that both associate with the best time in their lives.
- Each then overlays it from the laptop to his own voice recorded on the phone's dictaphone.
- Then the partners exchange records. And we get such mutual gifts to each other.
The main idea behind this mini-training: give the opportunity to say and hear from a loved one what is very difficult to say out loud.
Starting to write the list, the couple does not even suspect what may happen in the end
I give instructions in stages, for resistance and questions:
"Ouch! I can not do it anymore!" and "Why is this necessary ?!"
I answer: “Then you will find out. This is a magical exercise! For now, just write …"
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