2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Psychotherapy aims to help you solve your psychological difficulties, problems, mental disorders. That is, psychotherapy is designed to help. Help you. But, any medicine has side effects. So in psychotherapy, they also happen. And the most common side effect of psychotherapy is the destruction of your relationship. How does this happen and what does it make sense to do in this case?
The paradox in this situation is the factthat all the steps that will be proposed below are both a way to deteriorate relations and a way to improve them. See for yourself.
Step 1. Reflection
When you start to study yourself, your experiences, your desires, your motives, your thoughts, you begin to find the keys to your resource states. Objectively, you are depriving your attention, time and efforts that you previously directed to others. The antidote is joint reflection, exploring you with your loved ones. In the format of a hobby, leisure or entertainment. Or in any other format, which would not imply opposing you, but uniting you with a loved one on the basis of studying you as a person.
Step 2. Healthy relationship model
When you build a healthy relationship model, you start to be a more selfish person. In a good way. That is, you start to care more about your needs. What makes you happier. But relationships can come apart at the seams. After all, your loved ones may not be ready for that turn. The antidote is the collaborative part of the healthy relationship model. More collaboration means more chances for a relationship.
Step 3. Border protection
When you learn to protect yourself, your feelings, your opinions, your desires, you objectively facilitate the achievement of happiness and success. And immediately deprive certain resources of all those people around you. They are unlikely to like it. And they will push more. And manipulate. And criticize. And devalue you. The antidote is those emotional shields that involve being able to openly check your projections and polite persistence.
Step 4. Building trust.
When you learn to trust close people, it becomes objectively easier for you. But! Trust is not only about love and sympathy. Trust also applies to differences of opinion. And your negative emotions. And they often make life difficult for people around you. Or even they are burdened. The antidote is the emphasis in trust on broadcasting all of your experiences across their full spectrum. With a minus, always broadcast a plus. For your opinion, go to the opinion of your loved ones.
But there is a nuance. No matter how hard you try, remember that personal growth can indicate to you that your relationship may be too constraining and uncomfortable for you. And then they can collapse and end.
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