2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Not so long ago I wrote an article "It's a shame to grow old!" about the merciless beauty industry, playing on psychological trauma, and a few days later I was approached by a man who, by the way, had not read this article, but the topic of his appeal was the clearest illustration of it. The ways of the unconscious are inscrutable!
Nikolay (name has been changed, permission to publish was received) said that his wife had recently changed her appearance (in order to maintain complete confidentiality, I will not mention the interventions she resorted to). Their marriage lasts 10 years, each of them has it second. The couple have a six-year-old son, in whom both souls love.
Nikolai says that Alyona (name has been changed) from the very beginning of their life together constantly changed something in appearance, spent a lot of time and money on it, but he respected the wishes of his wife, although many changes seemed to him unnecessary and even worsened the appearance pretty and charming Alena.
But the latest surgical interventions made the wife's face almost unrecognizable, and these changes can no longer be corrected. Nikolai says that he sees in front of him the face of a strange woman, who has the voice and body of his wife, and literally goes crazy from this. Although the operations were successful, and if you look from the outside, Alena has a more modern, fashionable appearance. However, Alena herself is not happy with the new changes: she looks in the mirror and cries that it is impossible to return everything back, and blames Nikolai for not supporting her, not happy that she has become more beautiful. Says: "I did my best for you!"
But Nikolai loved his wife the way she was, loved her unique smile, dimples on her cheeks, a slightly upturned snub nose. He wanted to live and grow old next to the one with whom he had once fallen in love and to whom he remained faithful. He tells how deeply he was offended by his wife's words that she changed her appearance so that he would not start "running around women."
And this is a story not about Alena and Nikolai's family relations, but about Alena's psychological trauma, her projections that she unconsciously put into her husband, and about that man whose attention she once really wanted, but he was negligible … Father, beloved, ex-husband?
Deep psychological trauma of one family member cannot but affect others. Especially when it comes to marital and parent-child relationships. I would like to hope that Alena will be able to realize the need to seek psychological help, and Nikolai - to accept the new appearance of his wife, because they really have something to lose and something to fight for.
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