2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
She sat at a table with colleagues and her sister's fiancé. The number of non-verbal signals and signs of attention to a man was off the charts. Not because she really wanted to seduce him, but because this style of behavior was the norm for her and was not noticed by her. This is one of the most common sketches of hysterical structure.
This is how her way of communicating and existing is arranged. She will giggle loudly, sigh picturesquely and move her shoulder joints too languidly. Girlfriends and those who instinctively feel defeat in the struggle for male attention will be equal to her. They, too, will learn to sigh languidly so as not to "play" so clearly against its background.
Sincere friendship with women is not an easy task for her. Indeed, in each of them she sees a competitor, the only weapon against which - depreciation … She needs their acceptance and recognition as an equal. But he cannot afford it.
She will give a thousand and one signals for action, but as a result she will say that she did not mean anything like that and, in general, she is a decent woman. She will desperately fight for each new man, losing interest almost immediately after he turns his eyes to her. She strives for what she is actually desperately afraid of. Getting the attention of a particular man as an end goal is not as important to her as the process itself. Because she doesn't know what to do with genuine attention and interest.
She will behave like a little girl, laughing at the slightest excuse and pouting her lips from a barely noticeable frown. because regression in this case, the main armor and the most important weapon in the arsenal.
Often, her body will be displayed in "volume max" mode. But she does this in fact only in order to feel his "normalcy" and force herself to believe in her own desirability by other people. Because the body for her most often is not an object of pride, but a shame that comes from childhood.
Imagine an oversensitive little girl with a tremendous need for maternal sensitivity and nurturing. It is far from always possible to fully satisfy her needs. And then she is disappointed in her mother. Growing up, she separates from her mother through a powerful unconscious depreciation, “choosing” her father as a more attractive object. This is where the conflict arises, because it is not possible to identify oneself with the mother and compete with her. She still needs her mother and her support, while totally devaluing her.
As a result of this situation, men remain strong and admirable for her, while women remain weak and insignificant. The innate male power (in the understanding of such a girl) makes you look at them from the bottom up, at the same time (unconsciously) - to envy and hate them. Then her strategy is to side with men by punishing them. She will use her sexuality as the only weapon available, seasoning it abundantly with compliments and idealizations. So she will seek masculine disposition.
Yes, it is not easy with them, they are often excessive and therefore tiresome in their role. But this is rather a kind of a request for security. Having realized it and learned to express it in a different way, it will become much easier to achieve the cherished desired.
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