MASKrad Continues Part 3. On The Other Side Of Betrayal

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

We have already figured out in previous articles with the concept of "childhood trauma" and that this is a very strong emotional pain that a child experiences in situations where his inner need is not satisfied. This is the state that the child lives alone. And behind each injury there is a certain mask behind which the child hides.

In previous articles, we got acquainted with masks "fugitive", "addicted" and "masochist" … Today consider trauma betrayal, mask "controller" and mask mask "rigid".

This injury develops between the ages of 2 and 4 by a parent of the opposite sex.

Trauma occurs when a girl does not receive what she expected from her parents. She would like to receive more love and attention from her parents. But if for some reason she does not receive it, then there is a feeling of betrayal. And with a feeling of loss of trust in her parents, she continues to live. Further, this feeling is transferred to the men around people and it is very difficult for her to learn to trust people.

At this age, the Oedipus complex may appear, the child falls in love with his parent of the opposite sex. Girls often show jealousy towards their mother, a sense of ownership towards their father.

Such people are very afraid of repeated betrayal. And in order to prevent the loss of trust, they begin to control themselves, everyone and everything.

As adults, they can be good leaders. They get the feeling that they can do anything. Such people think that others will not be able to cope with the task as well as they do. After all, only they know how to do it right and how best. They can actually be more effective than others. But they spend a lot of time and energy on total control. That said, supervisors are often impatient with other people and easily pissed off.

They strive to show themselves as special and important. They can show their value through expensive attributes. Reputation is important for them, therefore, such a mask can often be found among celebrities. In some situations, they can be violent, especially if they feel pain, if they are betrayed, if they lose confidence in the person. Revenge can also be present in the lives of controllers.

The appearance of such people inspires confidence - confident with a lively seductive gaze, brightly dressed, muscular and with a good figure. Power is felt from such people.

Controller woman and the family should always be on the alert. Control over the husband - checking the phone and mail, constant control over the work schedule and time to return home. The feeling of jealousy is a constant companion of such women.

Children will not be left without control. She knows better what her child needs to do, who to be friends with, what circles to go to. And then what institute to go to, whom to marry, etc.

Controllers are good manipulators if they want to get something. Sometimes they can come to aggression and threats.

"Listen to me", "Trust me", "I am right" are often used expressions in the lexicon.

Women, if there has been a betrayal in their lives, can manipulate their children in order to take revenge on their husband. They may prohibit the father from seeing the children. They can turn children against their father.

Their fear of betrayal unconsciously triggers, and they believe that only through control can this be prevented.

And the final trauma we deal with, injustice trauma, mask "rigid".

This trauma awakens between the ages of 4 and 6 from one of the parents. At this age, the child needs recognition. He cognizes this world through the manifestation of himself, through actions. The child brings the drawing to the parents and wants to share his results. He expects to be praised for his beautiful drawing - after all, he drew it himself! He is waiting for an assessment of his results and achievements. But the parents do not care about his desire, they are busy with more important problems. And the baby understands and feels that he does not receive enough attention and approval. He begins to close in his feelings. And he makes the main conclusion in this state - you need to give up your feelings. It is hard for him to be himself, he does not know how to express himself differently. And a decision is made that he will do everything well and show himself through actions in order to gain recognition.

Such children do well in school, they go to good universities. They succeed everywhere (at school, in sports, in various circles and sections), perfectly build relationships with others and help everyone. But the constant feeling that they are not good enough for their parents does not leave them. Children with such a mask of injustice feel underestimated by their parents.

In adulthood, they create an image for themselves that they want to match. The outer look includes a great figure, good looks and a stylish wardrobe. This is very important for them. Have good self-control and adhere to boundaries.

The feeling of coldness haunts these people all their lives. On the one hand, they sincerely want warmth. They think they can give feelings of love and care. On the other hand, in their attitude towards people and loved ones, coldness and practicality are always felt.

Such people rarely seek help because they themselves are good at coping with their problems. It is easier for them to do it themselves and get the result than to ask someone else. It is very difficult for a man with a rigid woman, since he cannot understand what his help should be. And does she need any help at all.

Setting high standards for yourself is in the order of things for people with such a mask. And then blame yourself for falling short of them. Because of this, they are often unfair to themselves and other people.

It is very difficult for others to understand people with such a mask.

They can appear alive and dynamic, creating an image of a person without problems.

The lexicon often uses the phrases "Everything is good", "We will cope", "Okay".

We've covered basic masks and injuries. Someone tried on one of the masks for themselves. Someone saw his girlfriend behind the mask.

If you recognize yourself under this mask and want to correct the situation, then go through my author's program "I want to be happy", we will work together and you can heal this childhood trauma. This program will allow you to penetrate deeper into your wonderful world.

With love and care,

Olga Salodkaya