Psychological Trauma Or Drawing Of Fate

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

If any event that caused us pain is considered a psychological trauma, then we should not all crawl out from psychotherapists. And it's time to open psychotherapeutic hospitals so that we, so fragile in our recovery, do not have to go home in such a dangerous and aggressive city. And in general, it is not clear how then we are all still alive and some of us even periodically manage to feel happy? How do we do it

Personally, I don't like the word trauma, although I can't help but acknowledge its accuracy. It sounds as if it automatically turns a person into a victim. And in fact, at the moment of trauma, he was a victim. But, like an expensive perfume, a drop of which envelops a person in a cocoon for several meters around, the word trauma seems to automatically extend this sacrifice throughout life.

The word trauma has a rather powerful emotional connotation.

Some people find it difficult to admit that they have a childhood trauma, which they used to consider cloudless. It seems to them that by doing so they seem to lose that only unconditionally bright and good thing that was in their life. Someone, on the contrary, is very close to the position of the victim and the word trauma, as it were, turns on the green light in order to finally have the full right to feel unhappy.

However, hardly anyone would deny the presence in the experience of each person of events or factors that caused him mental pain. Can this pain be called a consequence of trauma? And does it have delayed consequences?

Let's look at the concept of trauma using the example of physical trauma for greater clarity. Trauma in general, according to the dictionary, is damage inflicted from outside. Further, injuries are classified according to their severity. And if the injury is insignificant - for example, a shallow cut, light burn or bruise, then, in the case of a healthy body, even without medical assistance and some kind of increased attention to it, it just heals by itself. For our wise body is capable of self-healing. Just like our no less wise psyche, like our soul. However, if the cut was deep, and the bruise turned out to be a fracture, then you can't do without the help of doctors. And most likely, such an injury will forever leave an imprint on the body in the form of scars, scars and joints aching to change the weather.

But, for some reason, in the case of the body, it is much easier to admit the presence of chronic injuries. Injuries to the body can be easily ascertained. Yes, there was a fracture here, here I landed on my tailbone unsuccessfully, and here I hit my head hard. Perhaps because we somehow have a right to the pain from bodily injury. We have the right to moan and even cry, wear a bandage, use crutches and not go to work. And help is provided there more often. Not always correct, effective, and in full, but still. Remember, when you broke your knee in childhood, it was most likely treated somehow, even if it caused even more pain for a while, perhaps even regretted it, stroked it. But, your broken knee was reflected in your mother's worried eyes. Your injury is attested! And if you were offended in childhood? If you felt rejected?

There is a high probability that this pain was devalued (yes, this is all nonsense), was not given the right to express (do not cry), aggravated (it is my own fault!). And then, later, in puberty and adolescence, there were many situations when your pain was boiling inside you, finding a way out for yourself except in your personal diary. When you could not talk to anyone about her, knowing full well that questions and advice would follow. And you did not know what to answer these questions and where to put these tips? And then, despite the "degree of damage", you did not turn to anyone for help, helping yourself as best you could, for which you had enough vitality and experience. And as a result, you have become who you have become! You not only survived, but also got stronger. The pattern of scars on your soul forms your personality. But are these scars successfully healed or still sore and bleed, it depends on the following parameters:

1. What was the extent of the damage. It is not the force of impact, but the degree of damage. It all depends on the general sensitivity and immunity. For some, a public flogging will be in the order of things, and for someone, a disapproving glance is enough to feel the pain of rejection and rejection.

2. Frequency or duration of exposure. When a traumatic event occurs in our life once, it can be written off as an accident, its consequences can be easily dismissed, but even if a not very strong experience is repeated from time to time or for a long time, it is no longer possible to ignore it. For example, petty theft. If your mobile phone has been "taken away" once in your life, it most likely will not be a reason for most people to worry. If petty theft accompanies you throughout your life all the time - trust in the world is undermined, the feeling of security suffers. Or, for example, ignoring your feelings and needs. It is one thing when it comes to a fellow traveler on the subway, who did not give you a seat at a time when you were very tired and dreamed of sitting down, it is quite another thing when your partner ignores your requests from time to time. This is where the accumulation effect takes place. Intoxication.

3. How you and those around you dealt with the injury. They saw, admitted, reacted, treated - this is one option, gritted your teeth, squeezed out a smile, devalued, passed by - quite another.

In any case, nothing passes without a trace, and these traces form a unique drawing of our image and our destiny. I like this metaphor much more than "the totality of the consequences of trauma." However, the essence remains the same. There are traces that just exist, and there are those that still hurt. And this pain can be different - habitual, aching, almost imperceptible because we no longer remember how it was without it. Or it can be sharp, sharp, unexpected, when a sore spot is accidentally or deliberately touched. But you can live with any of her. And we live. Someone is healed with the love and care of loved ones, someone is work that brings a feeling of need, someone is creativity, someone is religion, someone is psychotherapy. There are many ways - the goal is one. Heal wounds, lick scars, learn a lesson.