2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Anastasia, 25 years old, married, has a daughter. From adolescence, she began to feel the difference from her parents' families. Among the blonde grandmothers, grandfathers, aunts and uncles, she was the only dark-haired woman. She can freely talk about this topic with relatives and strangers, but she is afraid to ask a direct question to her parents.
Oleg, 32 years old, married, has a son. I decided to find my father. Mother and father divorced when he was one year old. He was taken to another city and all his father's attempts to establish contact were refused. By the time the son found his father in another country, only an inscription on the gravestone remained from him. Oleg went into depression and grief for a long time.
Marina, 50 years old, married, two children. After the death of her parents, she decided to go to the archive and still clarify how they lived before she was born. The adoption record turned her whole life upside down. At fifty, she found her living parents and a whole crowd of brothers and sisters.
Only three stories out of dozens that I have heard. A drop in the sea of doubt, tension and grief. No, in none of these stories did the parents and adoptive parents want to harm the child. On the contrary, they did their best to protect, support and raise a healthy, happy and self-confident child. This did not always work out. And who can sincerely boast that his child grew up exactly as expected? The grown-ups had one thing in common with the secret: the inner feeling that they did not know everything in this world. The mystery lived in their lives and over and over again broke free. In dreams, snatches of conversation, extra memories and chance encounters.
The secret of adoption did not always exist. It grew in lush color on the territory of the former USSR in the middle of the twentieth century. The terrible word of repression has entered and is firmly entrenched in the lives of people. Out of fear for themselves and their family, they changed their surnames, deleted family members from the memory of the declared enemies of the people, changed cities and professions. Thousands of children of repressed parents ended up in foster homes and orphanages. The apotheosis was the ban on divulging the secrets of adoption. Since 1968, for providing a child with information about his real parents, they were tried under Article 155 of the USSR Criminal Code. Now the article in various modifications continues to operate in Russia, Belarus, Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, Ukraine, Georgia. It seems that the idea of rewriting the child's data and the anxious expectation of exposure have become so ingrained in culture that it is impossible to live differently. Or is there still a chance?
The 1989 UN Convention on the Rights of the Child contains Article 7.1. “The child is registered immediately after birth and from the moment of birth has the right to a name and to acquire citizenship, as well as, as far as possible, the right to know his parents and the right to be cared for.” It's easy for me to breathe while reading these lines. We are all children of our parents. They were and we have the right to know about them.
"All data and personal details of people described in the article are distorted. All coincidences are accidental." The usual condition for the publication of personal materials in an article this time sounds like another echo of the mystery.
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