FLOUR OF CHOICE

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Why is it sometimes so difficult to make a choice?

We make decisions every day. Some are given to us with ease, sometimes we reflect on others for years.

Where do doubts come from?

It is difficult to define - the word itself evokes the associations "limit", "separation", "border" and the choice really refers to such concepts. Let's try to figure it out.

First of all, it is to take responsibility for your choice and its consequences … if you decide to quit, be prepared for difficulties and looking for a new one or opening your own business. Hence the desire to foresee everything and make the perfect choice, to make the most profitable decision.

The second moment that hinders decision-making is the desire to have everything at once. By refusing to make choices, we keep things as they are.

Having made a choice, we abandon all other options from which we chose

Having made a decision, we limit the range of our development opportunities in other directions.

But at the same time, we have certainty and specificity.

How do we make our choice?

Asking for advice, flipping a coin and hoping for the will of fate speaks of eluding the difficulty of making a decision on your own.

Tossing a coin, lots are often used to make a fair decision.

This is objective when both sides are involved.

But if you use these methods alone, then this is due to the inability or unwillingness to choose.

Many clients turn to a psychologist in the hope of getting specific advice and making decisions in a particular life situation.

Everyone makes decisions in their own way: someone relies on intuition and a momentary emotional decision, while it is important for another to weigh the pros and cons, to calculate several steps ahead.

Hesitation and doubts in decision-making are associated with the fear of making a mistake, making the wrong choice

In this case, one can imagine that a mistake has already been made, and then what, what consequences may occur

Everyone has the right to make mistakes. It's innate. Nobody can deprive this opportunity to be imperfect, imperfect. To stop trying to please and please everyone is a rather capacious task. We want to be loved, we try to do something better than everyone else, we strive to please and please.

After all, perfectionism is essentially the fear of failure, failure.

It becomes easier to make any decision when a person is ready to make mistakes.

Development and experience comes through trial and error. We draw conclusions and this makes it possible to move on, it already turns out much more confidently and better.

The fear of the unknown is another brake. You have to get out of your comfort zone - will it be difficult, but what if nothing is returned back?

And if we assume that there is no right answer?

There is only your choice and this is just an option

We do not have the opportunity to conduct an experiment and scroll through several options for the development of life after making a decision. We can only fantasize and reflect on if we had made a different decision. And this becomes a kind of "hook" from the past, prevents us from moving on.

Only in the film does it happen when you can go back to the past, change the time, or at a certain point the heroine's life diverges into 2 parallels and we can observe how the future depended on her decision to get on the subway car or not; or in another fantasy, where the death of one butterfly during the hero's journey into the past changed the course of the development of an entire civilization.

Life goes on as usual and every day we choose.

Belief in yourself and your own desires helps to become more decisive. Why so many doubts? Why is it difficult to trust and rely on yourself? Why is there no confidence in your knowledge and competence?

Of course, everything comes from childhood. Remember what immediate childish decisions, what careless thoughts and dreams!

The child believes in himself and takes the first steps, admires the result, falls down and tries again!

Growing up, the world around for someone muffles the flight of a flight of fantasies and aspirations, and someone sees more and more opportunities and interest.

Often, internal hesitation and conflict are carried over into an external situation. Internal difficulties are projected into visual worldly problems in order to understand yourself and cope, to find a way out.

Confidence in your goals is the key to decisiveness on the way to them

Categoricalness and excessive persistence can also interfere with making a decision.

Usually, this approach assumes two extremes and does not allow expanding thinking and outlook on the situation, considering other alternative options.

Emotions and intuition are good, but it is also important to get more information, be interested in the topic, learn, understand, it is possible to find out several opinions, reviews, weigh all the pros and cons.

What do you have to lose by making a certain decision?

-variants

-stability

But are you getting something?

-possibilities

-perspective

-definiteness

Do not be guided by the advice and incitement of others. Think about what's best for you. Take care of your interests first.

Use time as a motivating factor

Do not delay or delay making a decision.

Of course, you can disagree: "If I wait, the right answer may appear." You may be wasting precious time waiting for the situation to be cleared up. This anticipation makes you procrastinate and postpone other decisions related to this, reduces productivity and stalls the movement in life further.

Become self-confident, gain determination and make your choice easy!