Why Do Men Cheat

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

In my psychologist's office, the question sounds every day: “Why do men cheat ?! Why did my husband cheat on me ?! Have a wife, a child, an apartment, a summer residence, a car, a job, money ?! What else is needed for complete happiness ?!”I will try to answer briefly. For millions of years, while a person was being formed, there was no institution of marriage and family, and people lived on average for thirty years. Therefore, at the genetic level, no moral rules for communication between men and women were provided. Unfortunately, our genes do not contain the concepts of “family”, “one's own / another's wife,” “one's own / another's husband,” “treason,” “conscience,” etc. This is a big problem and a tragedy, but it is so. Thousands of generations of men and women had one goal - to conceive, give birth and raise new children, so that the lineage would not be interrupted. Modern studies of the genome show that even very different types of people entered into intimate relationships - Neanderthals, Denisovans, Cro-Magnons. Therefore, human genetics was rebuilt in such a way that with any prohibitions and difficulties, there would be sex, sex, and again sex. This is one of the answers to the question "Why do men cheat?"

💡 The institution of the family is a powerful obstacle to freedom of sex, invented by a civilized person (and thank God!) To reduce the number of bloody conflicts between men, increase guarantees for the survival of children and the peaceful transfer of property from generation to generation. But sex in the form of infidelity still seeks to penetrate any crack, thereby being one of the main reasons for the question Why do men cheat, which will be left to him by such husbands and wives that they do not know or do not follow the rules of marriage that protect against infidelity.

💡 Observations of primates and primitive tribes show that males / males are pushed into risky forbidden sex by the sum of four factors:

- prolonged sexual abstinence for more than a month;

- the possibility of personal contact with young women;

- recognition by other young women of the authority of a man, expression of respect for him, praise, laughing at his jokes (in animals, this is called grooming);

- the presence of counter sexual activity in other people's young women.

Unfortunately, the modern civilized family mankind is exactly the same. The same four factors work (reasons -Why men cheat):

- 💡 wives can avoid sex in the family for a long time, or engage in it with obvious reluctance, sad and boring (it is clear that they get tired of children and work, but the preconditions for cheating are still created);

- 💡 wives show their husbands personal disrespect, do not listen to their opinions, ridicule, criticize, scold, kick out, insult and even beat;

- 💡 at the same time, their husbands personally come into daily contact with many young women (colleagues at work / study / sports, clients, customers, suppliers, fellow travelers, etc.), including those with a sexually provocative appearance and behavior. Social networks Internet is another option for communication;

- 💡 these foreign women in every possible way increase men's self-esteem: they communicate with them at work with emphatic respect, listen to them, thank them, smile, drink tea and coffee, go to business lunches, etc.;

- 💡 other women flirt with other people's husbands, fall under their charm, fall in love, strive to use their resources and opportunities, directly or indirectly show that they are not averse to entering into an intimate relationship with them.

That's all! You don't even have to continue. You see for yourself - Why men cheat - there are absolutely all conditions for a man to cheat!

👿 Top Reasons for Cheating and Why Do Men Cheat? -sound like this:

Lack of sex and male authority in the family

against the background of obedience and willingness to have sex with those other women

with whom the man studies, works or communicates.

There is more than enough information for you to draw the right conclusions for yourself. You don't have to read further. If you are not afraid to plunge into the topic more deeply, I advise you to familiarize yourself with those norms of male sexual behavior that are genetically recorded in DNA and do not depend on consciousness and morality:

15 genetically based rules of male sexual behavior, or here's why men cheat:

💡 1. A healthy man wants sex every day, especially in the daytime, when he is at the peak of his activity (and not at all in the evening, when he is tired). And therefore he likes all slender young women.

💡 2. A man must by any means, by hook or by crook, get sex from a woman. The easiest way to achieve this is to become the dominant alpha male, that is, someone who is recognized and respected by other males: to be strong, brave, rich, cunning, etc. Or to be close to alpha males, since there are always women around them, something will fall on others. Therefore, everything that a man does in life is done for women. If a woman refuses a man and despises him, the man must still continue to methodically beg for sex from her, even humiliating himself. After all, humiliation is the concept of a reasonable person, there is no such concept in nature. There is simply a need and a need.

💡 3. The basis for getting sex from a woman is personal communication with her, being around, demonstrating one's capabilities (physical, character, available material resources, status, etc.). It is by being in close physical contact that a man has the opportunity to smell a woman's body so that the brain can evaluate the "chemistry of proteins", that is, the degree of compatibility of her genes with the genes of a given man. And in the case of high compatibility, that maximum of sexual activity, which we call "passion", is turned on. At the same time, a woman has the opportunity to appreciate the smell of a man, turning on passion from her side.

💡 4. Ideally, passion and mutual attraction should be included on both sides. But if a man and a woman have no other alternatives to sexual partners, then intimate relationships can begin and be conducted without passion, simply on the basis of sympathy, habit and affection. This creates problems in the future: after all, if a woman with the best set of genes appears and passion turns on there, she will easily invade someone else's family, she may even destroy it. Having received sex from a woman, a man should improve his attitude towards her, make efforts to raise her status in his eyes or in society, and ensure that her opportunities (nutrition, safety, etc.) increase at the expense of the man's resources.

💡 5 A man should value relationships with that woman (those women) that she herself goes to communicate and have sex with him, obeys him. Because it is perceived by his brain as the fact that she recognizes his high social status, it raises his self-esteem. In addition: the presence of a large number of women around men also automatically increases his prestige in the eyes of other men. Those who think: "Since he has so many women, perhaps we do not know something about him, but he has some serious resources, it is worth being friends with him." Although in fact, these resources can be given to him by the women in love themselves.

💡 6 Having a choice of women, a man should most often have an intimate relationship with the one who herself takes the initiative to have sex (since this shows her fertility and the readiness of the egg to fertilize), plus her behavior emphasizes the leadership of the man

💡 7 The appearance of a favorite woman (with high sexual activity and external submission) automatically leads to a deterioration in intimate relations with another woman, even if sex and communication there were at a quite acceptable level. Passion always triumphs over obligation.

💡 8 A man should first of all take care of the woman with whom he has the most frequent sexual contacts and spiritual comfort, patronize her, share his resources with her. Since there are no condoms in nature, it is highly likely that this woman is already pregnant from him, which is why you need to be near her, take care and protect. If it were not for this scheme, humanity would have died out long ago.

💡 9 If a woman with whom there were frequent intimate relationships and comfortable communication leaves a man, he is obliged to restore this relationship at any cost. The fact that his woman has already slept with another man is irrelevant. There is no self-love and male pride in nature, it has only instincts. And a man needs to help her raise his children at least the first years.

💡 10. Having irrevocably lost a relationship with a woman with whom there were frequent intimate relationships and comfortable communication, a man must as soon as possible create a similar relationship with another woman (new or former, including his wife), otherwise he may become depressed, die or die due to psycho-somatic disorders. Which are a kind of "self-liquidator" built into the human brain to remove the losers in the battle for procreation.

💡 11. Whatever conflicts occur between women - sexual partners of a given man, it is important for a man, if possible, to maintain contacts with all of them. For the more sexual partners a man has, the better he fulfills his biological mission. Male monkeys do it in silence, man has to lie and dodge.

💡 12 In a situation of choice between women, a man should stay with the one with whom he most often has an intimate relationship, who herself takes the initiative to have sex and, through her behavior, emphasizes the man's leadership.

💡 13. A man takes care, first of all, of the children of the woman with whom he has the most active sex and the most comfortable communication. Even if these children are not his own. Unfortunately, your children from another woman (i.e. children from your wife) can be abandoned. Because for millions of years the males did not know their children, and the females did not know from whom exactly they were giving birth. Therefore, the connection between men and children at the level of genetics is always mediated - through their mother. Only consciousness, conscience, honor and duty help civilized men to take care of children as women do on the basis of the maternal instinct.

💡 14. A man is obliged to sacrifice himself, fighting for the interests of women and children of his tribal collective with the attacking enemies.

💡 15. Since the procreation instinct is not in vain called "basic", and the individual that for a long time could not find a procreation partner, or which is denied sexual intercourse, in fact, is rejected from selection, loses the chances of passing on its genes further, nature has provided additional opportunities for a way out of this sad situation: Love can turn on.

Love is a corrector of individual egoism, a special program for suppressing another instinct - self-preservation, which is turned on when very difficult obstacles stand in the way of communication, and therefore sex. A person who cannot achieve reciprocity from a possible sexual partner, or may lose an existing relationship with a genetically very suitable partner forever, or there are some technical problems for the relationship (someone or something interferes) - suddenly puts the matter on the principle ! She puts aside all other matters, renounces any of her interests in favor of this relationship. Love allows you to maximize the concentration of all personal potential and all the resources of a person in order to put him / her to bed with another person. Even at the cost of work, career, money, health, life and, alas, even their own children.

Now, you know all the algorithms of male behavior, and you understand the reasons "Why men cheat", and you can read any man like an open book, predicting his behavior many moves ahead, as experienced psychologists and seasoned lovers do. It is known:

👿 Unfortunately, knowing the rules and reasons why men cheat does not obviate the need to follow them.

Of course, today's well-mannered man is not at all a primitive male chimpanzee. In his mind there is honor, conscience, shame, love for children, a feeling of gratitude for his wife, responsibility for his reputation, fear of losing his family and getting infected with something venereal, unwillingness to spend money on "left" women, career plans and a quiet old age with grandchildren, and many other civilized psychological attitudes. It is they who have to deal with genetic programs. Somewhere civilization wins genetics, somewhere instincts turn out to be stronger, divorce, betrayal and illegitimate children arise. The struggle between social and animal behavior in the head of each of us is called the “deep personal world of a person,” and the victory of one over the other determines the line of life, as on a cardiogram.

Therefore, building communication with her own husband, an intelligent woman cannot blindly follow the naive attitude that "my husband is not like that, he is good." As you know, "God protects those who are careful." Now you know the main reasons why men cheat, and hence, it is important to take all measures to exclude the occurrence of prerequisites for cheating.