2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
In relation to others, a person can be free in their decisions to forgive or not. This will most likely depend on several factors such as the strength and severity of the harm that caused the offense. Directly the person who performed these actions, and, accordingly, the attitude of the person towards her. It's one thing to forgive someone who pushed on the street, and quite another to forgive a friend who refused to help in a difficult moment. Most likely, the decision of a person to forgive or not will be influenced by his involvement in the process of resentment. Or perhaps the desire to manipulate others using forgiveness. Sometimes some parents do this in relation to their children: "You will get an A and you will play on the computer again." In other words, release from punishment occurs subject to the performance of some action.
Some people use roughly the same principle when it comes to the need to forgive themselves. To deserve forgiveness, one must suffer for it. Most people don't often think about forgiving themselves. Most often, such thoughts visit people after an event occurs in their life, the result of which is not pleasant to them, and they tend to blame themselves for it. And so, when the feeling of guilt before oneself becomes unbearable, a person looks for a reason to forgive himself. Often, forgiveness of oneself occurs through a simple transfer of blame to someone else, although a person objectively understands that this is wrong, but it is easier for him. But at the same time he remembers that he is to blame. The feeling of guilt is a very difficult experience for a person.
Almost every person has an event in their life for which they have never forgiven themselves. And this resentment remained inside the person himself, it may no longer be perceived so sharply, but its influence does not diminish from this. When a person experiences disappointment and an acute resentment towards himself, often, you can hear from him the following phrase: "I hate myself!" To say this at a time of high emotional stress. It is this hatred that can later work as an engine of the mechanism of self-destruction of a person, and he himself may not even be aware of this. In this case, in a person's life, events of consequences periodically occur, which adversely affect him. Some action, deed or word in the past that has not been forgiven to oneself can greatly ruin life in the present and in the future.
People do not like to remember things that have hurt them in the past, but sometimes it is worth doing in order to avoid trouble in the present. Since hatred, even unconscious, towards oneself due to a previously committed mistake, can be that restraining factor in the development of achievements that affects a person's life and behavior. You can forgive yourself on a very simple basis, that a person himself is in a single copy and there is simply no other, and accordingly there is always the right to make a mistake. Forgiving yourself allows you to get rid of hidden self-hatred and stop engaging in unconscious self-destruction.
Live with joy!
Anton Chernykh.
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