2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2024-01-31 14:10
The motto is not to live! It is based on dependence on a significant object (parental figure), the need for love, acceptance, basic protection and support.
In adulthood - developed infantilism, deep lack of confidence in oneself, one's value, recognition of one's desires and needs.
Strict control or complete ignorance on the part of parents, power, unwillingness to let their grown-up child float freely. The child strengthens the union of the parents or is the only support of one of them.
A lot of guilt. “Because of me, all the troubles of my parents. I am guilty of their suffering. I am responsible for their well-being and happiness."
"I am bad. I need to be punished. I hate myself".
Subconscious self-destruction. The meaninglessness of its existence, its purpose. The significant object is replaced with another "subject" of dependence. Alcohol helps to relax, to get away from feelings of guilt, regret, not to feel insignificance and weakness.
Difficult feelings. Suppress yourself. Destroy. Punish. Self-destructive program. “I could not be worthy of love. They left me. Nobody needs me."
Emptiness in the soul. Inexpressible feeling of loneliness.
Inability to do without alcohol - a substitute and a switch from reality. Alcohol dulls pain, dispels meanings, takes you to the "kingdom" of dreams and dreams, where there is no real suffering, difficult choices, responsibility, effort to do something constructive.
The ability to be "free", brave, omnipotent, to release your aggressive feelings outward. Then there is relief. Because keeping such feelings constantly in oneself is unbearable, there is a lot of internal tension, anger, disappointment, resentment, shame, regret about one's “lost” in life.
Impossibility to create sincere and close relationships.
Unconscious "thirst" and need for tenderness, warmth, reliability, security, love. Often the inability to show these feelings in a sober way … There is a lot of fear that they will be punished. Fear of life, the world. Before rejection, betrayal. Then it is better to be the first to reject, so as not to be abandoned. It's unbearable. A lot of anxiety. Drinking alcohol is anesthesia from experiencing difficult feelings.
Early childhood trauma is possible. They didn’t want you, they didn’t like you the way you are. They didn’t want to give life. They could have destroyed. Subconscious fear is always present - the deprivation of life. Then it's “better” to do it yourself.
“I am unwanted, unnecessary … Why should I be here? I'm alone.
Alcohol "helps" to adapt to difficulties in life, relieve excessive stress, and reduce anxiety.
The addict and the codependent can have similar mental trauma. So they support and "play out" on each other. Then you can survive. It is impossible for one to live. The illusion of closeness. Even so …
The life of a person addicted to alcohol is colored with depressive notes of self-destruction, fear of death, powerlessness in front of real life. This is a special "state of mind", painfully expressed when the will to live is suppressed, and the vital personal existential needs are not satisfied.
The man resigned himself, “put on a cross,” got entangled in his complex mental labyrinths. “Life passed by,” but he was left with unrealized inner potential, an acute feeling of hunger for love and close relationships. And a huge rage, mixed with an avalanche of aggression, which he directs on himself, punishing and blaming for the fact that he was powerless in life. And I could not change anything in her.
It is extremely difficult to help such a person without his desire. You can "get poisoned" yourself or get bogged down in the "swamp" of his created auto-aggressive internal "pits". He pulls along, realizing that he himself will no longer rise …
The inner world of an alcoholic is filled with the agony of anger, irritation, aggression, which he directs both to himself, in the first place, and to his close environment. He destroys himself and everyone who is nearby, toxic effects on them.
He chooses not to live, dying slowly and inevitably. To do this, he takes alcohol. Increasing the dose to lethal. He accepts his outcome and is often unable to resist his way of life.
Alcoholism is a mental and physiological illness. A state in which, first of all, the will of a person is amazed and his personal meanings are lost … There is no sense of life, meaning and understanding of one's existence. The internal background is bleak, apathetic and dull, something meaningful and valuable has been lost, and no replacement has been found.
Life comes down to "dumb" drinking. Without taking another dose, it is impossible to survive at all.
"Alcoholic intoxication" carries away into the realm of relaxing artificial joy, carelessness, bragging, emotional "do not care", creating the illusion of closeness with those who "help" to use.
In this form of dependence, there is a lot of inner lack of freedom, loneliness, fear of life, unwillingness to take responsibility for one's choices, personal infantilism and great inner longing for spiritual closeness …
Chronic alcoholism is an auto-aggressive attitude towards oneself, destructive aggression directed at oneself, punishing and destroying oneself, harming oneself.
Where does it come from? For example, in childhood, a person was very angry for a long time at a parent who was tightly controlling him. Or someone else from the inner circle who treated him with disdain. And then he suppressed all this in himself, he could not express and return destructive emotions directly to his offender. Unconsciously, unlived, painful feelings for the psyche find a way out through aggressive behavior. In which not the one to whom all this is addressed is punished, but the person himself" title="Image" />
Life comes down to "dumb" drinking. Without taking another dose, it is impossible to survive at all.
"Alcoholic intoxication" carries away into the realm of relaxing artificial joy, carelessness, bragging, emotional "do not care", creating the illusion of closeness with those who "help" to use.
In this form of dependence, there is a lot of inner lack of freedom, loneliness, fear of life, unwillingness to take responsibility for one's choices, personal infantilism and great inner longing for spiritual closeness …
Chronic alcoholism is an auto-aggressive attitude towards oneself, destructive aggression directed at oneself, punishing and destroying oneself, harming oneself.
Where does it come from? For example, in childhood, a person was very angry for a long time at a parent who was tightly controlling him. Or someone else from the inner circle who treated him with disdain. And then he suppressed all this in himself, he could not express and return destructive emotions directly to his offender. Unconsciously, unlived, painful feelings for the psyche find a way out through aggressive behavior. In which not the one to whom all this is addressed is punished, but the person himself
A person addicted to alcoholism has many suppressed and unexpressed feelings that traumatize and destroy him from the inside, creating mental pain, strong internal stress and mental discomfort.
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