2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Quite often, people come to therapy who are characterized by an excessive need for addiction. Most often, they are forced to seek psychotherapeutic help by dissatisfaction in the relationship of basic attachment. Overly dependent individuals often feel helpless when left alone. They consider other people to be strong and successful.
Organizing their lives around an addiction relationship in which they take on a subordinate role, they feel satisfied when they succeed and experience deep unhappiness when they fail. Their emotional anxiety is centered around the fear of abandonment. As a rule, addicted people behave passively and in most life situations feel insecure.
It is very difficult for such people to express anger for fear of displeasing the other person and, as a result, being left alone. In therapy, they show all the qualities that are characteristic of their personality - they readily begin therapy, agree with all the therapist's suggestions and interpretations, and are unable to express their lack of understanding of what is happening or disagreement with what the therapist says or does. Such people tend to idealize the therapist and seek feedback from the therapist that conveys a message that they are good clients.
Often they behave too compliant in therapy and try to offer their services to the therapist, also such clients are inclined to guess what the therapist wants and strive to please him in everything. In such a situation, the therapist may be tempted to be a great mentor and expert, not encouraging the client to autonomy but reinforcing the addictive traits.
One of the variants of addictive psychology is a passive-aggressive pattern, when the client's attitude is colored by aggressive addiction. Passive-aggressive people also define themselves through other people - "I am the wife of this goat." They are also dependent on the other, but in a variant of the opposition. They also find it difficult to define their own goals and achieve them.
Establishing contact with someone who responds in a passive-aggressive manner is not an easy task. Negative feelings in therapy appear quite early and it is very important for the therapist not to get involved in power rivalries and suppression of the client. These clients need to identify their negative feelings.
Another version of the addicted psychologist is her counterdependent version. Such people exhibit rigid independence, which is a formation formed by defense mechanisms that guard the consciousness against a strong desire for addiction. In some cases, these clients have some other addiction.
The main goal of therapy is to help you accept your need for addiction as a natural aspect of human life. After that, a healthy balance of dependence and detachment can be established. When the client succeeds in giving up counter-dependent defenses, a period of sadness ensues, associated with an early unmet need for dependence and only after a while - true autonomy, devoid of defenses.
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