2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Unfortunately, many adults still cannot define and understand their experiences and the emotions that excite them. Without a subtle differentiation of the meanings that our language gives, they are unable to understand personal problems or solve them. Merely labeling emotions can have transformational implications, reducing unusually painful, dark, and immeasurable feelings of despair to an ultimate experience with its own boundaries and names.
Learning to label emotions with a more nuanced vocabulary can be transformational. People who can identify the full range of emotions are better at coping with the ups and downs in everyday life than those who see everything in black and white.
Along with accepting the importance of labeling emotions comes understanding, because as soon as we name them, they will give us useful information. They signal rewards and dangers, and point in the direction of mental pain. They also tell us which situations to worry about and which to avoid. They may not be barriers, but beacons that help us identify what worries us most and motivate change.
Trying to learn from your emotions, it doesn't hurt to ask yourself, "How functional is this?" You can even concretize the question: “What is the purpose of this emotion? What does she tell me? What does she give me? What is under the weight of sadness, frustration, joy?"
Guilt can help you prioritize and even add action to it. In the end, you would feel in front of what you do not care. Your guilt can be a road sign pointing to the people you love and the life you love.
Likewise, anger can be a road sign that something important to you is under threat. Deeper, he may signal that this is dearer to you than you thought, or that you are somewhere not as confident as you thought. The experience of anger is not always a pleasant thing, but the knowledge it generates can be turned into active activity. And this road sign can indicate the necessary positive changes.
Once we stop struggling with sad feelings or suppressed by positive beliefs and rationalization, they can teach us valuable lessons. Self-doubt and self-criticism, even anger and regret, can shed light on those dark, hazy, demon-filled places that you most ignore because they are places of vulnerability and weakness. Revealing these feelings can help anticipate pitfalls and prepare more effective ways to deal with critical problems.
If you can handle both gut feelings and outward choices and differentiate them, then your chances of a good day will be higher, not to mention your quality of life. You will make critical decisions in the light of the broadest possible context.
It takes honesty and integrity to embed our experience into a narrative that is ours and serves us, helping us understand where we have been, so that we can better see where we want to go.
To be continued…
The article appeared thanks to the book "Emotional Agility" by Susan David
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